I was reading the newspaper sometime back and came across an article about a 16 year old boy’s struggle with gender identity ‘confusion’ and how he initially thought he was gay and how he finally embraced the fact that he’s actually a girl , and how he’s going to have a sex change operation after his class 12 exams. His family & peers are supportive and his NRI mother bought him his first dress even and thinks he has pretty legs!
The story, of course, doesn’t end here. The mother goes on to narrate how she felt he might be gay initially as he always insisted on playing with dolls and wigs and even though he was ‘encouraged’ to play with tanks and guns, he never conformed! Also, by the time he was 12 years old, he was already going in for counseling sessions as he felt he was gay and wanted help with this ‘confusion’.
Now I’ve seen 12 year olds and I’ve been a 12 year old myself. I’m sure everyone has. When I think of my childhood, I remember having a little chapter dedicated to intercourse in my science textbook and that’s about it as far as my generation’s exposure to sexual knowledge went. As a child that young, I recall being curious, but since there were so many things around to keep us distracted, like sports, debates,books,and.meaningful time spent with the family where we.learnt some values,that there was hardly any space for sexual craziness.
Also,there was nothing much on TV that depicted overt sexual imagery or homosexuality as even a concept, there was no burden on most children from my generation, to come to terms with or identify with.
What’s also interesting is,the fact that I recall not being a very stereotypical ‘girly girly’ myself in fact, I played basketball, baseball, loved wrestling and hated cooking!
But back then, this was not defined as ANYTHING really, just kids being kids and doing what they wanted without a care in the world. There was no burden of gender identity or any definitions at all.
As matter of fact ,every child goes through a phase of confusion where he or she is unable to decide what they want to become. Back then,it was about choosing a career, nowadays it’s about choosing a sexual orientation and a gender!
So what’s changed?
Nothing much, I’d say. Children are still children, but it’s the parents and culture that’s changed.
The mother in this story states, that when he discarded the guns he was ‘encouraged to play with ” she was afraid that he might be gay!!!
THAT is very telling.
The mother,the school,the counselors managed to play havoc with this child’s absolutely NORMAL phase of exploration and led him to believe that he’s confused. What kind of a parent sends her 12 year old for counselling because her son likes to play with dolls and what kind of counselors end up convincing the child that he’s actually a boy trapped in a woman’s body? This is borderline child abuse if you ask me!
Also, where is the FATHER in all of this? I can’t help but notice the absence of a ‘father figure’ in the child’s life. Did he even get to give masculinity a chance? And I refuse to count ‘offering him guns & toy tanks’ as a fair introduction to his true, natural , masculine instinct.
Of course,children are struggling with a lot today as their lives are full of violent and sexual imagery thrown at them through pop culture and movies and then there’s this huge LGBTQ movement to reckon with, that’s creating a turmoil in their tender minds. At an age when the knowledge of heterosexuality can be shocking enough for the child, imagine a daily dose of homosexuality, transgender-ism, androgyny, gender fluidity etc thrown at them!
No wonder they’re turning out like this.
In the end I’d like to say just one thing
“God is not the author of confusion but of peace “