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How to sustain meaningful relationships

Good Evening Planet

Before we begin, let’s revisit our understanding of a meaningful relationship. Predominantly there are two sorts of relationship. One is referred as therapeutic wherein you enjoy your time together and get healthy. The other one is based on a primate dominance hierarchy in which one party is a slave and the other one is a master. Such a relationship is mostly considered unhealthy and damaging.

Let’s pause for a moment. Prior to understanding complexities involving relationships and how to overcome them, we need to understand if and why we need them. New age kids have found a pseudo mechanism wherein relationships are replaced with short term acquaintance. Internet has brought people closer but feelings are as distant as they were in medieval ages. The first step towards an amicable solution is understanding the importance of a meaningful relationship. I am going to make a very strong statement – We need people. Yes! Irrespective of how relative we consider freedom of existence, we cannot be totally free from the basic genetic social component. Even a hermit is delighted with an occasional visitor and cherishes a disciple. In the same manner meaningful relationships nourish us as a human being and help us get better.

Now comes the most challenging part: How to sustain a relationship? I have met countless individuals who have great social skills and make friends easily but none of these relationships last longer than few months. One needs to wonder why?

Well, the problem sounds complex but the solution is too easy. We do not communicate. Communication means listening and then talking efficiently. Most of us in this fast paced world skip the first step. We do not listen. We wait for our turn to speak. Whenever we meet someone, our first goal is mostly to acquire dominance. We barely pay attention to what they are saying or feeling or expressing. We focus on putting our point across as quickly as possible. We are quick in brushing off their issues with remarks like – Ya I know, yup life’s difficult, shit happens, blah and blah and blah. What we fail to understand is we are actually minimizing their personal conflicts and making them feel petty. This in turn helps us feel better and we walk away from the conversation as a confident person. All we are doing is acting like a primate and giving way to our most basic primal urges.

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A better way would be listening and trying to learn from the other person. Each individual would have at least one new thing to offer us, if we listen. We can always ask questions to seek clarity. We can always paraphrase. Instead of being on top of the conversation we can stay in the conversation and after few of such sessions; both the individuals would have a healthy flow of ideas. So if you really want to have a meaningful relationship unlike baboons : Listen.

That would be all folks!

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How to deal with procrastination

Good Morning Planet

Waking up is always the most important part of the day. You wake up, you look around, you find everything you care about is falling apart. You prefer going back to bed. Your stomach growls, makes some noises, you grab some leftovers with a little booze and stuff it inside. You are aware stuffing in or not – nothing would ever change. You feed yourself because you do not have the constitution to starve yourself to death. You further intoxicate yourself to numb your senses. You indulge in a handful of other escape phenomenon – watching tv shows, playing video games, mastrubating; then you go back to bed. Sounds like an ideal day!

A little more productive day would be maybe working for a corporation while you are zoned out. You are there, you are present physically but your soul keeps on wandering off in the gallows of nothingness. Not that I am questioning your lifestyle but what if I can suggest you a better alternative?

Your life is perfect. You are a philosopher. You are not an average Joe. You are the most unique Joe. You belong to the long list of awakened souls – nihilists. Any action you take has no meaning so you prefer not to give a fuck. That’s my philosophy too. I am pretty aware that the less you care, the simpler is your life. The only challenge with this philosophy is – you cease to exist. There is no hope for a better tomorrow and no longing for a missed yesterday. Not that it matters but a little hope isn’t that bad.

So, here a working model for a better tomorrow suited for nihilists-

  • Stop punishing yourself: The world was, is and would always remain an ugly place. There is absolutely nothing anyone can do to make things better. What you can do is make it bearable for yourself and people around. So, the first step is stop punishing yourself. You are suffering and more suffering wouldn’t ease your misery.
  • Find a goal: Easier said than done, I know but it’s essential. While figuring for a long term goal develop micro habits. Get up and make your bed. Clean your room. Those empty walls around you have committed no crime. Cover those naked walls with some paintings, quotes, inspiring celebrity posters, whatever turns your crank. Cook your breakfast. Wash your clothes.
  • Measure your success: You would fail. Not once, not twice, countless times but remember whenever you fail, you never begin from the first step, you only repeat the last step, hence technically you didn’t fail. Someday you would succeed and you would feel better.

All said and done, the reality would still remain the same. This world is an ugly place and it would continue to haunt you till your last breath. It’s your choice how to look at it. It’s your choice how to interact with it. Whether you want to numb yourself or feel the occasional joy amidst tons of sorrow, choose wisely.

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Dark Times

Dark ages wasn’t so bad after all

They used to hunt beautiful witches

Brave men were crucified

Kids were burnt alive

Pagans killed the one who believed

Vikings were made to praise Christ

Women were whored against their will

Elders were beaten, Poor were frowned

They all had a void inside

They fought brutally before their kings died

No amount of women

No weight of gold

Ever quenched a barren soul

Those unknown to own truth

Jostle around with nothing to find 

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Now they have government, television, religion

Military, police, a society with class division

Robbery, rape, infanticide, murder, terrorism

Assailants, gurus, a society with lame vision

Dark ages wasn’t so bad after all

Times were changing

Now nothing is static

Everything is falling apart

It’s appalling

 

Where does charity go?

Dear Brothers and Sisters of Democratic Nations,

Today we all happily live in our humble, yet comfortable adobes and proudly enjoy the love of our family and friends. We all have access to basic amenities of life and we make the most out of it. Our children very proudly march to the national anthem in their respective educational institutions. Long Live our countries and Long Live our children. May God always be merciful on us and keep on blessing us with his gift of love.

We all are not just decent but also great human beings. We take care of our youngers and elders equally. We lead a happy and blissful life. We also make sure that we contribute towards the good of society and most of us enthusiastically participate in social and charitable events.

I wanted to wish all of you a very happy and blissful life ahead. May we all flourish equally.

Despite of our good nature most of us are either oblivious to the injustice towards the poor, needy, oppressed, minority, women and kids or choose not to engage in such depressing conversations. I am completely with you in your point of view because I used to cultivate similar thoughts.

We are a part of a capitalist society where the principle of existence is based on making money. We need to be at par with the changes of times, if we wish to lead happy lives. I understand your need to become rich and I would not demean it by labelling you greedy. We all have our dear ones to feed and clothe. We need to extravagantly marry our sisters and daughters to socially display our love towards them. Even as cavemen we had the desire to own homes and what’s wrong to own a fancy, comfortable roof. In the end, we all want better lives for ourselves and our families.

 We celebrate festivals, birthdays, anniversaries, graduations, even death at times. We make sure we proudly donate to our corporate endorsed 13 charitable organizations who very proudly claim to be helping animals, children, people and literacy. We also donate billions of dollars annually to religious institutions. Even your little one’s never shy away from leaving $1 in the charity boxes outside temples, mosques, and churches. All this money comes out from your banks debited by the goodness inside your hearts.

Today I just wanted to ask a question.

Where does all this money go?

AS far as I remember the poor were poor and the needy were needy and the oppressed were oppressed and the women were victims and the children were abandoned, when I was 7 years old. I used to cry a lot seeing them suffer. I am 27 years old now. It’s been 20 years watching people suffer and trillions of dollars donated to end their sufferings. Surprisingly they still suffer and oddly I still cry, each morning, every afternoon, evenings and before I attempt a failed sleep.

It’s beyond my reasoning to understand this degree of failure of these so called charitable and religious institutions.

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A BrokenRadio initiative for underprivileged children

We, BrokenRadio run an online blog majorly focussing on making the world a better place.

www.brokenradio.blog.

Due to our revolutionary unbiased take on social issues funding has started pouring in from across the globe.

As much delighted we were because of such overwhelming support, initially, our spirits were crushed when we realized that these funding are either religiously or politically motivated. As much as we want to help people, we cannot indulge in blood money. Religions breed hatred and kill people. Governments thrive on fear and enslave people.

We the people demand free the people.

If any of you good souls wish to stop contributing to the failed charitable and religious institutions, we would happily engage in your small contribution. Any little support towards this bigger cause would be highly appreciated.

We want to change the world and we want to make it a better place, for our children. But Rome wasn’t built in a day and Alexander the great had a fleet. We are powerless without your support. We would encourage you to contact us with selfless funding assistance. In return, we would show you how powerful is a smile of a needy and how fake is the society endorsed by those who are greedy. Hope for your assistance.

Have a great day and may your children have a better tomorrow.

nishantnishit@outlook.com

Insomnia

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And her thought striked

Once again, last midnight

She leaves me be

When I think of dying

The moment my heart pumps blood

My socket of eyeballs starts crying

Lost in oblivion

She never nears

The moment I smile

She never bears

All the directions

Nine fathoms Deep

I got no dope

How the fuck do I sleep!

Closed eyes see her face

Open eyes menace

Go away go away

Lover, I got nothing to say

Go away, with your false bundle of joy

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Nothing is Static

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She moved slowly, towards him
With a definite pace
He moved slowly, away from her
With a chaotic pace
They moved closer with a sway
They parted away with decay
Everything is falling apart
Nothing is static
It’s appalling

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Those smiles faded
Lame cries echoed
No one to cheer
Souls lack the ability to hear
Those painful cries wrapped in love
Shut down feelings
Everything is falling apart
Nothing is static

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She smiled for a last night
Tears rolled down those pale cheeks
Salty are her bleeding lips
Blood dried between open legs
Nothing is static
Everything is falling apart

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It’s appalling 
She would go to find a new home
Today! This day!
The end; She said⁠⁠⁠⁠


Pics credit: Felisha

Loneliness

I was looking out the window

The green pastures smelled of spring

The raindrops held the leaves firmly

While they slowly dropped dead on the ground

There was none around me

No one to make a sound

I hate noise; it breeds turmoil

But today I felt the need of someone, anyone to be around

A tear struggled hard before rolling down the corner of my left eye

That’s when I realized

I got no one to call mine

I picked a pen and a paper

But the ink got laden with salty water rain

The paper turned RED

I got no idea

How much I bled!

I got no idea

How much I bled!

I guess, A pint of blood would be an understatement

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Celestial Time Shift

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I prefer staying indoors

I cherish isolation

When I look out the window

I see the vibrant ugliness

When I close my eyes

I see you and my soul cries

The tears drown my dry eyeballs

I roam around in empty halls

Looking for traces of lost memories

You are what I found

When I burnt everything around

Down to the ground

I won’t step out

I won’t let the world destroy my cherished memories

That’s the only learning

You my only earning

You my immense wealth

My prized possession

A bundle of joy

Of the times we spent together

Staring into each other eyes

Saying things we never said

In mid of a celestial time shift

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Kashmir: A Heavenly Cemetery

It was the Persian poet Amir Khusru who referred to Kashmir as a paradise on earth. There is an old stone plaque in, Shalimar Gardens, which proclaims “Agar Firdaus bar rōy-e zamin ast, hamin ast-o hamin ast-o hamin ast,” meaning “If there is a paradise upon earth, it is here, it is here, it is here“.

It is also mentioned that when Jahangir was asked on his deathbed about his cherished desire he is credited to have said:

“Kashmir, the rest is worthless”

Well, reading such great poetic words:

Always I wondered

How could one term a piece of land heaven

It baffled me for ages

Why do poets write such praises

After all it’s just a land, few trees, few mountains

A valley blessed with decades of unrest

Lost peace as a concept

A land once white as snow

Now has traces of blood 

On every leaf which has the mettle to grow

A land trampled by army boots and assault rifles

A land filled with widows, staring out the windows

Bleeding for someone long gone

A land whose kids wish a life at dawn

Return home clad in white, powered by saffron

What’s so special about a ruined town?

Why is it a talk among the nations around?

Well, I never knew what ‘beautiful’ meant

Until I set foot on Kashmir’s heavenly ground

A land blessed by Allah himself

A heaven with gunfire in the background

A heaven with bleeding, dying children in a mound

Throats choked with tear gas and smoke

Unable to make any sound

A heaven destroyed brutally

By you and me collectively

Absence makes the heart grow Fonder

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Yesterday night, the moon and the stars shone bright

The galaxy was alive, while I held you tight

And you slipped, like sand through my fingers

The clocks on the walls became motionless

While I secretly stole, few stars from your hair, tucked behind your right ear

I know someone else owns them, but ain’t finders, keepers

You belong to someone else but I never wanted to keep things

For myself!

I do want you to dance with me

But you prefer dying alone

I wish I could leave you be

But every morning, you & me

Need to travel to save those dying stars

You might but I can’t do it alone

Whoever you choose to spin with, on the dance floor

Whoever you wrap your arms around

The song would always be made of my broken words

The music would always be mine

The less you see of me

The more you would miss me, staring at you

With blank, silent eyes, laden with unsaid speech

I wanted to lie next to you

But haunting you in your dreams, works just fine

What the world fails to understand

Is, whoever you choose to dance with

Lover, you belong to me, You are mine

You would always be mine

I certainly miss the kiss, which I could not dare to steal

But then again, there’s always tomorrow, there’s always a fucking tomorrow!

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The Green Plant & The Lady in Red

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Grab Classy Sequin Wall Canvas – Lady in Red  www.grabclassy.com

 It rained last night

The stars were dull

The moon was gloomy

Her eyes shone bright

She flew kites, all her last days and all those lovely nights

She felt free, roaming around 

With a bear trap, chained to her leg

rattling the ground, as she walked and trampled and moved

This morning, the green plant caught her gaze

She got confused, she got dazed

The earth around was barren

Though her last night was brazenly wet

She looked at the green plant

The plant looked back

Staring he saw, his lovely lady in red

the plant bled, the plant bled

And the land around, blossomed

The lady in red stood motionless

She couldn’t see; hear no sound

Her heart skipped few beats

All she heard was a pointless rhythmic beating of few punctured valves

Lub-Dub Lub-Dub Lub-Dub Lub-Dub Lub-Dub

The lady in red, went back to her bed; she had witnessed enough rain for the season

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The Rain and The Song

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Brutally raining it was

In the middle of night when I paused

The waking dream of haunting past woke me up

my dried throat demanded a sup

My music player played a melody song

the sweetness of your voice; My soul felt the throng

Back to the time when we would be lovers

In a jiffy the period so long recapitulates

feeling the words that your lips tremble to utter

In the dark of these rainy nights

Baby, I want to feel the warmth of your breath on my neck

The song drowned me even deeper

Into a time where I would caress her

The lyrics appears lucid

corners of my memories bruised

Those haunting memories forces rolling tears

reminding me of a loss my soul bears

But I pick up my shattered pieces

I shrug off the daunting past

for there is no reason to steadfast

Our troubled times together

no longer offer, pain or respite

A day comes and you are a distant memory

I can’t even remember your face; you might

I want to thank you for the lessons taught

for the loyalty and gains that I had sought

Today my shackled self is free

like a bird on a sprouting spring tree

The rain and the song tried their best to drag me back

unshackling the chains I ran and ran, until I eluded the sack!

Malik Umar

Srinagar, Kashmir

 

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