Insomnia

IMG_20170819_074630

And her thought striked

Once again, last midnight

She leaves me be

When I think of dying

The moment my heart pumps blood

My socket of eyeballs starts crying

Lost in oblivion

She never nears

The moment I smile

She never bears

All the directions

Nine fathoms Deep

I got no dope

How the fuck do I sleep!

Closed eyes see her face

Open eyes menace

Go away go away

Lover, I got nothing to say

Go away, with your false bundle of joy

IMG_20170819_074605

 

Nothing is Static

Screenshot_20170817-181933

She moved slowly, towards him
With a definite pace
He moved slowly, away from her
With a chaotic pace
They moved closer with a sway
They parted away with decay
Everything is falling apart
Nothing is static
It’s appalling

Screenshot_20170817-181148
Those smiles faded
Lame cries echoed
No one to cheer
Souls lack the ability to hear
Those painful cries wrapped in love
Shut down feelings
Everything is falling apart
Nothing is static

Screenshot_20170817-181117
She smiled for a last night
Tears rolled down those pale cheeks
Salty are her bleeding lips
Blood dried between open legs
Nothing is static
Everything is falling apart

Screenshot_20170817-181832.png

It’s appalling 
She would go to find a new home
Today! This day!
The end; She said⁠⁠⁠⁠


Pics credit: Felisha

Magical Book Lamp

Why you should never judge a book by its cover!

Book Of Light from GrabClassy.com is a multi-functional portable lamp hidden in a hardcover book.

Opens to 360 degrees to provide a warm ambient light.

Includes a USB Cable, magnetic cover which sticks to metallic surface.

Provides up to 5 hours of light on one single charge

Portable, lightweight and easy to carry.

Brought to you by

www.grabclassy.com

While Travelling or Camping

IMG_20170810_054128

With Family or a Nagging Girlfriend

IMG_20170810_054158

Alone in the Wilds

IMG_20170810_054144

In a Room full of Delights

2017-08-14-2-4272686258-1502760676142.png

Whenever, You need Light!

Grab Classy provides a perfect Lamp and an Amazing Gift.

It is meant to bring a smile and surprise on every face.

The Book Of Light  – BOOK LAMP INDIA

www.grabclassy.com

IMG_20170810_053723.jpg

Comes in two different Models.

4 Different Lights in one of a kind RECHARGEABLE – LED BOOK LAMP

12.jpg

Mini Book Lamp India – Single Light – Rechargeable – LED book Lamp / Book Of Light

Possibilities are endless.

www.grabclassy.com

interior_home_03-2.jpg Lumio-Lamp_01CaptureOpenHue-Book-Lamp-2-1IMG_20170810_054226

This baby will make you fall in love straight away. Open to bright up your day and close to turn off the light and back to a book 📓 carry it anywhere / USB charge / standby of 3-4 hours.

IMG_20170810_054328

Your Adventure Partner

lum-lumio-mini-outside

Come to the bright side and feel the Magic!

IMG_20170810_054346

Starts Rs1799 including shipping and taxes. COD available all over India.

Order Now to avail Early Bird discount!

Available exclusively on

www.grabclassy.com

When it comes to Home Décor; Grab Classy would never bore

GrabClassy powered by BrokenRadio

This looks ugly!

This looks ugly!

Childhood is a curious stage of our lives. We encounter with and learn to deal; an entirely, never felt before, fresh set of feelings. Feelings unknown to self! Feelings which our enslaved consciousness is conditioned to consider, prohibited!

Each incident, we experience in our lives, both small and huge, is always unique, in it’s own flimsy way.  Each experience adds knowledge to our vast data base. Though our minds have been tamed by targeted, suppressive, behaviour training, by widely regarded institutions, we still have a crude, primal being, inside, wriggling in pain, searching for truth. The truth of our existence, which is hidden, behind all those, numerous, false stories, we tell us and the world, each morning and every night.

Growing up was fun. The solo objective of Nik’s days were not to get caught. You need to tread carefully, if you want to experience fun, for longer periods. Getting caught can change the equation and dampen your free spirits. Hence, Follow the rules and break them, when no one’s watching! That was his motto of life during those days.

Are you crazy? You want us to skip college, in order to, watch some movie, you find fascinating! Do you want to get us expelled?‘ shouted Max, as loud as his lungs allowed. He made sure, he displayed emotions of anger, using his facial expressions. Conversations, both friendly and unfriendly, are more impactful when proper display of emotions is added.

‘Not some movie, that is where, you are entirely wrong. The movie is named – Fight Club, based on the novel by the same name. This is your life and it’s ending one minute at a time. ‘Your’ being the highlight of the moment. It’s your life, your time, your mistakes, your decisions, your contemplation, again, your mistakes and your failures. So you can decide whether you would like to use your time in order to understand something, larger than your petty life or you choose to follow, mundane, set guidelines of your so-called educational institution.’

And Nik continued preaching his philosophy –

“The essence of our educational system is to help us learn the art of making money. This in itself is a flawed concept, as money is a reward for success. Instead of learning, the art of making money, we should be learning how to identify and nurture our passions. Passion fuels our success, which in turn, generates, money, as a bi-product……You are advised to borrow money from financial institutions to achieve your temporary goals which are determined, not by you but by different, failed institutions of society, eg: Family, Schools, Colleges, Government, Corporations, Temples, Mosques and churches…

You need stuff! A big fucking television, an Iphone, a luxury car, a DSLR, social networking presence, celebrations in bars, branded clothing, matching footwear, planned vacations, tax benefits and a place to call home. Now, the world knows, you cannot buy any of these, without being successful. Even if your parents hand it to you, you would not be able to enjoy, the fruits of nothingness. Hence we got banks! They are such nice institutions that they offer you assistance, to buy your dreams, on easy installments. Welcome to the corporate endorsed world where happiness sells on billboards and if you find happiness expensive, your friendly banker would loan you money, which then you can pay back, till you die, of course, using an easy, payback, monthly, installment plan, which you are free to choose from many plans.

Sip a coffee, Drink a cola, You just sold yourself!


This excerpt is from Nishant’s – Broken Radio – Novel. This book is not for those who believe in happily ever after tales. It’s brilliantly creepy, violent and extremely offensive in nature. It preaches a cult philosophy against an emasculating consumerist culture.

The story is a brilliant mix of transgressed elements held together by dirty realism. It focuses on characters who feel confined by the norms and expectations of society and who break free of those confines in unusual or illicit ways. Because they are rebelling against the basic norms of society, protagonists may seem mentally ill, anti-social, or nihilistic. The book deals extensively with taboo subject matters such as drugs, sexual activity, violence, pedophilia and crime.

Read – Broken Radio (Novel)

Gun & Marriage licence!

Broken Radio

Nishant


Pillow talk is an essential bonding activity in a relationship. The less tenured is a relationship, the more impactful are pillow talks. It has been two years, now, since Dia and Nik moved in together but their love is still as potent, as it was, the first night. 

They make sure that the fire doesn’t burn down. Dia sits on Nik’s lap while he continues to shower her with nimble kisses. He loves licking her skin, with his tongue. He starts from her neck and continues going till her belly button, pauses for a second and then glides from her bellybutton to her thighs, till her toes.

‘Are you planning to eat me? You never get tired. Do you? You horny fuck,’ Dia says.
‘You can stop me, when, you want to. Why don’t you stop me?’ asks Nik.
‘I don’t want to.’

After burning some more calories Nik proposes, ‘Hey sweetie pie, we have been together for long and surprisingly, it’s working out, let’s get married.’
Dia gets surprised on hearing Nik talk about marriage.
You hate marriages,’ she enquires.
Yes, in principle, I do but I want to, spend the rest of my life, with you!’

You know, I can’t get married to a non-Muslim. It’s a sin for me,’ she states blatantly.

And what about this? Is this not a sin?’ he says while his hands, play, with her breasts. She moans in pleasure and whispers,

There are sins which can be forgiven and there are some which cannot. Sleeping with you makes me a sinner but I still would get forgiveness. Marrying a Kaffir is haraam. No forgiveness there
‘You and your beliefs, never made sense to me. You do know, you are twisting facts?’
How come you don’t believe in anything?’ asks Dia, in order to deflect.

‘I believe in nature. I do believe, in the universe. I believe in Kabir, Krishna, Mira, Jesus, Prophet but not as gods, as Rock stars. They were original Rock stars. They had long hair, their own bands, their original tunes; they had groupies, and they held concerts. I do believe in something and that is pretty straight. Not at all twisted!’

‘You and your beliefs never made sense to me,’ Dia says while biting him on his neck and they laugh.
They continue indulging in each other while Nik manages to convince Dia, that if it’s all the same to her, they should get married; If not a real one, then just, as an, interesting activity! ‘Let’s get married for fun!’
Nik pleads for hours, before, Dia agrees to take it as a fun activity and together they march to a registrar’s office. They dress fancy and enter the offices of  –                                                                                          ‘Gun & Marriage licence.’          

        They wait, there, for a while. Nik wore his happy face.
A clerk asks them to come to the desk.
‘Gun license would be ready in two hours. Marriage licenses take a week. What are you here for?’ asks the clerk.
I need a license,’ replies Nik.
Which model?
Oh no! I don’t need it for a gun. I need it to get married,’ says Nik.

The clerk looks at him, then looks at Dia, then looks at both of them and points his finger, towards few forms. ‘Fill these forms and come after a week!
Nik wanted to get married the same day.

I want this to be done by today’s evening. I can pay you extra, if that would help,’ he pleads. ‘I wish. Marriages, take time, my friend. Go for a gun instead. I would get you a licence by evening’ answers the clerk, sadly.

Dia looks at Nik, and they both burst into laughter. They leave, from that office and go to a nearby ice-cream parlour. 

Eating ice cream, together, is an essential bonding activity in a relationship. Nik loved vanilla and Dia loved strawberry. They order a two in one.


Source: Broken Radio(novel by Nishant). This book is not for those who believe in happily ever after tales. It’s brilliantly creepy, violent and extremely offensive in nature. It preaches a cult philosophy against an emasculating consumerist culture.

The story is a brilliant mix of transgressed elements held together by dirty realism. It focuses on characters who feel confined by the norms and expectations of society and who break free of those confines in unusual or illicit ways. Because they are rebelling against the basic norms of society, protagonists may seem mentally ill, anti-social, or nihilistic. The book deals extensively with taboo subject matters such as drugs, sexual activity, violence, pedophilia and crime.

Read Broken Radio – Novel

Untitled design (2)

What we talk, when we talk, about, Love! – Act II

Good Morning Planet

It’s a bright, sunny morning, here in the BrokenRadio Studios, and we bring you ACT II of

“What we talk, when we talk, about, Love!”

Act I – What we talk, when we talk, about, Love!


BrokenRadio Theaters present, to you, a play written by Khadija (You think You know) & Nishant (Broken Radio).

Act II – Begins,

( The stage is brightly lit with various performers dancing in the background. Nik is standing on the stage with few pages in his hand. He has, his reading glasses, on. The music fades away..performers continue dancing. Nik addresses the audience)

Curtains Rise!

(Crowd cheers. Loud Applause)

Understanding The Rise in Skies & the Fall on Earth

Nik : The title in itself, is enigmatic. The poetess is comparing two cosmic events. One being Eid and other falling in Love. The poetess talks about a confused and unsure kind of love, that is really rare and yet the most captivating. (He comes forward on the stage)  The protagonist to whom the poetess address as the ‘Dark Prince‘… is a great admirer of her and is madly in love with her. As much, as the poetess tries not to develop similar feelings, she does get smitten, eventually. Mostly, the poem talks about their secret encounters and exchange of words.. What poetess envies the most is when she experiences cosmic love, the Dark Prince is not their celebrating the rise in the sky; Eid.. As much as the poetess hates it, she’s willing to give him another chance as she too is hopelessly in love. (Nik throws the pages in air)
 But then again, who knows poetry.. It’s always, what’s not said, never, what is.

(Lights fade out. The background changes itself back to the Act I setting. Nik removes his reading glasses. Kate walks in)

Kate: Brilliant job. You scored an A. Although, it isn’t the true derivation entirely.

(Moves forward on the stage and addresses the audience)

Well, the rise in the sky and fall on the earth shows, how you take me high in the skies and then throw me down on the ground. I experience a bliss in a moment and in the next, you abandon me mercilessly. When the world spoke about us, You said; my destiny walked into my door. My pride and your ego clashed and doomed were we. Then one night we met again after your endless efforts of getting me back. And we celebrated the festival like it was the last Eid on earth. You said – it’s us against the world, give me time, cope with me.

(The stage fills itself with mystic silence. We could hear loud breathing.)

Nik: (murmurs slowly to himself) There was silence in the air. All three of us were breathing heavily. Me, her and Johnnie Walker. (Nik walks away from Kate and continues murmuring)  I am jealous of this Dark Prince, Kate dedicated a poem for him! (Looks at a picture of another women) The only lines she ever dedicated to me was – “I am nobody’s fool” and it took me weeks to understand, what it really meant.

Kate: Life was perfect!

Nik: (walks near Kate) Well, let me dedicate my prayers for your eternal, blissful, family stamped, first love. If this doesn’t see a happy ending, then love should, atleast, not be in dictionary and books should paint it black, with dark ink.

Kate: That’s so accurately put. This is not love, though! (pauses for a moment, looks lost in memories) I don’t know, what love is.. 

Nik: What is it, then? I have no clue, what love is! Truly, Sincerely, Please tell me.

(The performers swarm the stage and start dancing rigorously, there is no music, playing, in the background)

Kate: It’s hard to express. Maybe 10000 pages or maybe less! Why are you, so intent to know the definition of love?

Nik: I need to write about love and I have not, ever, experienced it. Hence the curiousity. I want to know, what love is!

Kate: (looks at him for a moment, lovingly, addresses the audience) Love is divine, it makes you experience the most extreme emotions that you were oblivious of. But it’s got one and only one rule; You have to forget self love and even if you can’t, have, your love, for yourself, forever, smile and be grateful for the memories and experiences. Love does not mean achieving. Love needs no labels, no possessions, no ownership. You welcome it’s arrival, with a smile, and then you let it go, with a smile. (looks at Nik and continues) So, If your fav doll is lost, don’t cry, rather cherish the moment you had with it and live life.

Nik: That does make a lot of sense, Miss. But, I need a clarification. I guess, in our lifetime, we experience love more than once. So is their something also called – True Love? Or it’s the same every time!

Kate: (addresses the audience) I don’t know, that’s an interesting question. According to me, love is just once, But that does not mean it seals your fate. You carry on and live life, settle for someone really charming, who makes you happy.

Nik: (looks at Kate) Would you care to know my thoughts? (Doesn’t wait for her response and continues, addresses the audience) To understand love, we need to understand time. (dancers in the background are not at all performing in sync, each artist seems to be following their own steps, the stage suddenly gets chaotic, lights flicker) 

There is past, present and future. Past is all memories and Future is entirely imagination. So, what matters is now! Present matters. Not what happened a moment ago, not what might happen next, No fear, no assumption, Just now – living in the moment. (Goes near Kate) What are you doing now? (she thinks, he doesn’t wait for her response and continues speaking to the audience) Right now…right fucking now…She is experiencing release of adrenaline and dopamine, look at her, how happy she seems (there is a sadness on Kate’s face) We are experiencing effects of tiny pills laced with love. (Nik comes to the edge of the stage and yells)

There is no absolute love. That is a cosmic event.. Barely happens.. I am trying to recreate, but still it takes ages.. This is day to day love.. What people call love, when they talk about love. What humanity needs to experience, is, Cosmic love. Feeling of being around even during absences.. Dreams.. Mutual dreams.. You communicate without words. You close your eyes and your partner feels you missing them…
Love is not necessarily both sided.. Moon and the sea try and hug each other, failing, every full moon night..When the moon is completely naked.. That’s the love I talk about. That’s the love I want to experience. I want to know what love is!

Kate: (holds his hand) Look at us, making a failed attempt at defining love..

(They both stare into each other eyes. Curtains Fall, Crowd goes crazy, Crowd whistles among the loud thud)

Play Ends.


Whoa! That was something. Huh? Let me make breakfast, she would be awake soon. You enjoy your friendly Tupperware! Have a nice day.

What we talk, when we talk, about, Love!

 

Good Evening Planet

It’s a lovely evening, indeed. There is a dazzling, shimmering, reason behind this love, in the evening. Yesterday morning, I released the first chapter of my 2nd book – Smokes & Strings – Boulevard of Broken Art. It’s a love story. A twisted one.

I had my doubts, because, what do I know? I, have, never been in love. I just experienced what television sold, not the books…the Television. I went out on dates in shopping malls, bought gifts and had sex. It did seem like love, back then. Now, I am a grown up. I no longer watch television. I only read books and I only talk to writers. And, I want to know what love is…..

I asked my friend, Khadija Fatima – Author of You Think You Know ,”Do you know, what love is?” She sent me a poem. The Rise in Skies & the Fall on Earth. But then we all know, we need to figure out ART. It’s always ”what’s not said” and never, ”what is”.

So, I made some failed attempts to understand it and finally gave up. I, then again, asked her to explain….And we both ended up writing this play….


Ladies and Gentlemen, Tonight’s entertainment is a play about love, loss, pride, humility and then, love, again. BrokenRadio Theatres Present, to you, a play written by Khadija (You think You know) and Nishant (Broken Radio) .

PicsArt_07-12-11.30.47

Act I – Begins,

Lift the curtains!

(Crowd Cheers, Loud applause, A remarkably thin male is sitting on a stool, in front of a stunningly beautiful female. They both are in their prime youth and seem very cheerful. The entire stage is lit with bright lights, with no gloominess in any corner, apart from, in the eyes of, both the protagonists)

Nik: How are we doing today, Kate. What are we doing?

Kate: Heya! Ahh been occupied. I had company. Now, was enjoying my alone time, and then you walked in and sat, there, right, on that stool.

Nik: Well, if anyone would have such a delightful company as you, blessed are those few.

Kate: Ain’t you guys just too nice.

Nik: Well, you pay me to be nice. I think, I should get at least twice the amount you pay me, because, of the time I invest in you . Your project, I mean!

Kate: Oh, I didn’t know, I pay you to be nice.

Nik: Yeah, a very unfair amount though but then there are other perks which I truly enjoy.

Kate: You are funny! (Sarcastically)

Nik:  I am serious, always. It’s, you, who somehow induce humor in my deadbeat words.
And I guess, glamor, too.

Kate: Yes, glamor, I agree cause I just love it. We’re both sarcastic.

Nik: I am not. Talk about yourself, Lady! (pauses, clears throat) You are the friendliest ‘client’, I ever had the pleasure to service. Never met someone with your potential, in this, big, bad, round, uneven, world. 

(A smiles spreads on Kate’s face and the black and white lights change to a rainbow)

And, that smile, That’s, what makes my days, and evenings, and someday, other periods of my long, lonely, lazy, mundane, days.

Kate: My goodness. I think, I’m done with compliments. 

Nik: (stammers) Oh, Okay, no more for today, then. (Pauses for a second. Dramatic music plays in the background, for a second. Music stops) Glad, I have nothing to say about your, yesterday’s picture. It just made me speechless.

Kate: (blushes) Oh, about that, I think, I was too happy yesterday since everyone loved my poem. So, hence the glow. (Comes closer, and whispers in his ears) Even, in the theatre people were staring madly. (Pulls her face back and continues talking). So, Yeah, partial credit goes to you for publishing it. And my makeup of course 😸 I love shimmer!

Nik: (Comes closer, and stares in her eyes) The stares were all for you, so, you deserve the credit. (lights go dim, girl bows down) Shimmer, loves, being on you. (pulls her closer) You think, you know, let me tell you something, Ignorance is bliss. 

icelandic-dance

(Lights are back. It’s just a white, bright light. Nik and Kate adjust their seats, the moment lights, change color. There is a chaotic silence on the stage. The background music is of an animal being choked to death. The music gets louder. Nik stands up. Kate pulls her chair farther away from him.)

Kate: (coldly, her voice comes from far to the audience) So, what could you make from the poem? 

Nik: (Addresses the audience) And the poetess wants to know… What, the commoner sees… Okay! 

(looks at her and continues)

Understanding, The Rise in Skies & the Fall on Earth ….

The stage drifts away from behind, from beneath, his feet. The background metamorphoses into an old, dusty, rusty, library. Kate exits the scene. Nik wears reading glasses. And the curtains fall…Crowd cheers..) 

ACT I – Ends


Hope, you guys enjoyed reading this, as much as we enjoyed writing. BrokenRadio would return with the second act, soon enough. Grab a smoke for now. Will ya!

The Rise in Skies & the Fall on Earth

Good Evening Planet

An adrenaline junkie is somebody who engages in sensation-seeking behavior through “the pursuit of novel and intense experiences without regard for physical, social, legal or financial risk”. Such activities include extreme and risky sports, substance abuse, unsafe sex, and crime. The term relates to the increase in circulating levels of adrenaline during physiological stress.

Dopamine is another profound chemical. The effects of dopamine include increases in heart rate, body temperature, and sweating; improvements in alertness, attention, and endurance; increases in pleasure produced by rewarding events; but at higher doses agitation, anxiety, or even loss of contact with reality.  Stimulants such as nicotine, cocaine and methamphetamine promote increased levels of dopamine.

Only a handful of addicts are aware that ART induces a combination of both adrenaline and dopamine. This evening a dear friend of mine, Author – Khadija FatimaYou think You know, made me read one of her poems. Well, I am high on her words ; A perfect blend of two of the planet’s most profound chemical.

As much as I wanna save this drug for myself, I cannot deprive the world from such beautiful poetry. So, Ladies & Gentlemen, this terrific evening, Broken Radio presents you, an original poem by Miss Khadija Fatima!

art-boy-dreams-galaxy-Favim.com-3963062

“The Rise in Skies & the Fall on Earth

You beamed with wits when you saw me

A little gut feeling went unattended

Danced like a lunatic when we met

Made me reminisce an old love song in your red dodge

Table with Kebabs and Game of thrones

Surprised me with taste of India in a Pak lounge

Twice the dawn turned into dusk, then we met again

Flirted with flamboyance until I gave up

We flew away as written in the palms of time

Months passed with eternal nights filled with thrills

Planning and preparation, our palpations never halted

Then you came crossing the deep seas

When we met in the mist of frosty days

I set eyes on you and I knew you were mine

When the world asked our story, your lips moved radiantly

And the bliss I heard, “my destiny walked into my door”

How we loved our chilly walks full of joy and fear

Our confound natures created a havoc

And it all ended in sorrow and vague

Until the darkest night crawled back, we met again

I buttoned your sleeves and relived your skin

Humoured and ridiculed the world in good faith

The mighty Eid arrived, and it struck what I missed

We spoke the unheard words, us against the world

My quest with the dark prince, who said we still got time…  “

— Kate

9fae56f792a6c2ab2933e243e817cffe

 

Pahlaj Nihlani : Chronicles Of A Fool

Greetings!

For those of you who don’t know who he is, Pahlaj Nihlani is the current Chairman for the Central Board Of Film Certification in India. This man gets to decide what we can watch, as a country, when we head to the movies or nestle in our lazy chairs at home in front of the idiot box. And he’s serious about his sanskaars. So serious that in a country that’s 1.2 billion strong & counting, where child marriage is still a reality, where children are raped irrespective of their gender, caste or social strata, he feels we’re not ready to hear the word ‘Intercourse’ on screen yet! The word that I last read 14 years ago in my biology textbook while preparing for my class 10 boards & which got replaced by the word ‘fuck’ as soon as I started college! Thta’s the word he has a problem with & wants beeped out in the new SRK movie, ‘When Harry Met Sejal’. Besides, Mr Nihlani has been a producer in the Indian film industry many moons ago & we all know…that his movies never had the word intercourse in them! Because I have just had breakfast, I do not wish to think about Nihlani’s movies or their sexual innuendos or even the double meaning lyrics because of obvious reasons.

 

And he not only has a problem with ‘intercourse’, he seems to have a problem with anything that is inherently ‘female’. Case in point, when he banned the movie ‘Lipstick Under My Burkha’ from being screened in India, here’s what was told to the film maker of this movie as to why the movie was banned

“The story is lady oriented, their fantasy about life. There are continuous sexual scenes, abusive words, audio pornography and a bit sensitive touch about one particular section of society, hence film refused.”

pic-437x222

Obviously, that remark is ridden with more problems than just poor sentence construction & grammar! Anyhow, the makers of the movie went on to get the movie cleared for a theatrical release in India after the country’s Film Certification Appellate Tribunal (FCAT), decided that the film can be issued an adult certificate, equivalent to an NC-17 rating.

burkha

Even before this fiasco, he tried meddling with director/producer Anurag Kashyap, while his movie ‘Udtaa Punjab’ was due to release but fortunately or unfortunately, that controversial & fantastic movie got accidentally ‘leaked’ on you tube, much to the delight of the nation & Mr Nihlani went biting the curb then too!

udtapunjab-1464783260

By this point, I can understand how he would have been feeling powerless & as we all know, desperate times lead to desperate measures & so, in a bid to redeem himself, Mr Nihlani prepared a strategy.

  1. Aim low. Target a word rather than an entire movie. That way, movie makers would give in without much of a fight & Nihlani would get to feel powerful. A little.
  2. Chose an SRK movie for maximum impact.

jab-harry-met-sejal_149733535720 (1)

It was all going according to the ‘plan’ when suddenly, he was asked a question by a reporter from a New channel called Mirror Now as to why did he have an objection to the word intercourse? This is what he had to say

“You take voting from the public and I will clear the word (intercourse) on the promo and the film also. I want 1 lakh votes and I want to see that India has changed and Indian families want their 12-year-old kids to understand the meaning of this word (intercourse).”

Now, Mirror Now’s Prime Time debates are hosted by an extremely rational, level headed journalist who hasn’t lost touch of reality or her sense of humour & so, in the right spirit, she, Faye D’Souza, accepted the challenge thrown by Mr Not-So-Smart & was able to gather much more than just 1 lakh votes. And I must say, she didn’t need to put in much of an effort either. Mr Nihlani, are you insane? What did I say our country’s population was? More than 1.2 billion. How many votes did you ask for? 1 lakh. All we had to do was send out a tweet to SRK’s 25 million followers on twitter and the ones who were stuck in traffic at that hour were able to accomplish the task!

faye

What ensued was a laughter riot. It’s alright to fail now & then, but you can easily & gracefully redeem yourself by accepting defeat & stating that the people have spoken & I respect the verdict. But NOOOOOOO It’s a fool we’re talking about here. He has mastered the art of humiliating himself in full public view by now & so not only did he refuse to answer any question posed to him by a rather polite journalist who cornered him in elevator, but he even ended up looking like a nincompoop on National Televion!

You’ve brought the debate from “Whether Nihlani deserves to be Censor Board Cheif” to “Whether there’s a need for a Censor Board at all” Mr Nihlani. That, to me, is your one & only achievement. Hang tight to that.

 

Jack Sparrow: Aye Aye Captain!

Good Morning Planet

Today is Friday. I love Fridays.

It is mentioned in the Quran:

O ye who believe! When the call is proclaimed to prayer on Friday (the Day of Assembly, yawm al-jumu’ah), hasten earnestly to the Remembrance of Allah, and leave off business (and traffic): That is best for you if ye but knew!
And when the Prayer is finished, then may ye disperse through the land, and seek of the Bounty of Allah: and celebrate the Praises of Allah often (and without stint): that ye may prosper.

— Qur’an, sura 62 (Al-Jumua), āyāt 9-10

In Hadith, The Prophet said, “On every Friday the angels take their stand at every gate of the mosques to write the names of the people chronologically (i.e. according to the time of their arrival for the Friday prayer) and when the Imam sits (on the pulpit) they fold up their scrolls and get ready to listen to the sermon.”

Even the schools I studied in and the corporations I worked with, cherish Fridays, in some manner or other. In schools we were given a break from the same boring, dull, uniform and we could look shiny and dazzling. In corporations too, there is a fresh vibe and no dress code. So Friday is a fun day.

Lately, I have been writing a lot about overwhelming corporate corruption and I have criticized PM Modi and CM Yogi in a blatant manner. That has generated me a lot of love. Today morning an old friend from the old times, Rahul Panchal, left a love note on FB –

“You talk a lot of shit from your ugly and shitty mouth about a lot of people. You have lately started doing same about our PM Mr. Modi.

Do you do the same for your mother as well ?

Stop being a dickhead MOFO.
#WANNABEARTIST
#FAKELYF # FUCKYOURSELF”

I was extremely delighted to hear from him. We spent some good times together in the past. Some of you might think I am being sarcastic and there is no plausible reason for me to be happy after reading Rahul’s comment. Well that’s untrue. Among all the love he showered me with, he used a hashtag #fakelyf, that’s a campaign BrokenRadio ran two months ago on FB. It gives me immense pleasure to see that my work has not been forgotten. Thanks for bringing a smile on my face Rahul. And let’s catch up someday. Our political differences should not deter us from socializing. I always found you cool. And I like cool people.

When we talk about cool people, well, ignoring Jack sparrow would be a hate crime. Jack sparrow, the wisest sailor, is the coolest of em all. During the month of Ramadan, I promised my dear friend and author, Khadija Fatima – You Think You know, that I would write a great piece about Jack sparrow. (I oversold my writing in order to impress her, wink, wink, wink. No mortal can ever pen down the greatness of Jack in words.)  Her hair recently went salty and peppery, which I absolutely love and I also owe her Eidi, so, here it is, a small tribute to the great, Jack Sparrow. (oops, there got to be a captain somewhere). My bad folks, it has always been Capt. Jack Sparrow.

So, Ladies and Gentlemen, This Friday Morning, Broken Radio Theater presents the infamous, lovable, witty, daring,monster slayer, lord of the seas, robber of hearts, Capt Jack Sparrow  –

(Crowd cheers – Jackie, Jackie, Jackie. Women faint while shouting – Jackie, Jackie, Jackie. Jack enters on the stage)

Jack-Sparrow-cannibal-chase-Pirates-Caribbean

Me : Welcome to our humble adobe Captain!

f7fc4a301835e4270e22ec1a598c8acd

Jack Sparrow : Why is the Rum gone? (murmurs to himself) Where is that girl with those splendid locks, you spoke about.

Me : She crossed the sea Capt. She is in Dubai, the land of gold.

(Jack looks at Kate’s pic, stares, continues staring)

Me : What happened Capt?

JackSparrowProfile

Jack Sparrow : You need to find yourself a girl, mate. Or perhaps the reason you write three blogs a day is that you already found one, and are otherwise incapable of wooing said strumpet. You’re not a eunuch are you?

Me: Let’s not get personal Sir. We are here to talk about you not me.

Jack Sparrow: You seem somewhat familiar. Have I threatened you before?

Me: Not that I can remember, Captain.

Jack Sparrow: Do us a favor… I know it’s difficult for you… but please, stay here, and try not to do anything… stupid.

(Jack turns around and looks at the studio audiences and yells)

article-1334428-04E249B10000044D-849_468x391

Jack Sparrow: Shoot him and cut out his tongue, then shoot his tongue! And trim that scraggly beard! (finger pointing towards me) I have no sympathy for any of you feculent maggots and no more patience to pretend otherwise. Gentlemen, I wash my hands of this weirdness.

Me: But I am a fan.

On_stranger_tides13

Jack Sparrow: Good man. Weigh anchor, all hands! Prepare to make sail!

[takes out compass]

1490919552-captain-jack-sparrow-image-captain-jack-sparrow-36050334-480-326

We going to sail to the land of gold. I need to meet this lovely lass they call Kate, the one who has splendid locks. You can come along but, Mate, if you choose to lock your heart away you’ll lose it for certain and Gentlemen, m’lady, you will always remember this as the day that you almost met Captain Jack Sparrow ! [escapes]

JackSparrow

(Curtain Falls)

 

 

 

 

The Revolution Will Not Be Televised

“The Revolution Will Not Be Televised”

You will not be able to stay home, brother.
You will not be able to plug in, turn on and cop out.
You will not be able to lose yourself on skag and
skip out for beer during commercials,
Because the revolution will not be televised.The revolution will not be televised.
The revolution will not be brought to you by American Express

In 4 parts without commercial interruptions.
The revolution will not show you selfies of Modi
blowing a bugle and leading a charge by John
Mitchell, General Abrams and Mendel Rivers to eat
hog maws confiscated from a Harlem sanctuary.The revolution will not be televised.
The revolution will not be brought to you by the
Schaefer Award Theatre and will not star Natalie
Woods and Steve McQueen or Bullwinkle and Julia.
The revolution will not give your mouth sex appeal.
The revolution will not get rid of the nubs.
The revolution will not make you look five pounds
thinner, the revolution will not be televised, Brother.

7b2a149d229ad04c688cae79d3c4d40d

There will be no pictures of you and Willie Mays
pushing that shopping cart down the block on the dead run,
or trying to slide that color television into a stolen ambulance.
NBC will not be able predict the winner at 8:32
on reports from 29 districts.
The revolution will not be televised.

There will be no pictures of pigs shooting down
brothers in the instant replay.
There will be no pictures of Whitney Young being
run out of Harlem on a rail with a brand new process.
There will be no slow motion or still life of Roy
Wilkens strolling through Watts in a Red, Black and
Green liberation jumpsuit that he had been saving
For just the right occasion.

Green Acres, The Beverly Hillbillies, and Hooterville
Junction will no longer be so god damned relevant, and
women will not care if Dick finally screwed
Jane on Search for Tomorrow because Black people
will be in the street looking for a brighter day.
The revolution will not be televised.

article-2565995-1BC2765000000578-685_964x670

There will be no highlights on the eleven o’clock
news and no pictures of hairy armed women
liberationists and Jackie Onassis blowing her nose.
The theme song will not be written by Jim Webb or
Francis Scott Key, nor sung by Glen Campbell, Tom
Jones, Johnny Cash or Englebert Humperdink.
The revolution will not be televised.

The revolution will not be right back
after a message about a white tornado, white lightning, or white people.
You will not have to worry about a dove in your
bedroom, a tiger in your tank, or the giant in your toilet bowl.
The revolution will not go better with Coke.
The revolution will not fight the germs that may cause bad breath.
The revolution will put you in the driver’s seat.

The revolution will not be televised, will not be televised,
will not be televised, will not be televised.
The revolution will be no re-run brothers;
The revolution will be live.

Jerusalem-riots-AFP-800x430

Gilbert “Gil” Scott-Heron (April 1, 1949 – May 27, 2011) was an American soul and jazz poet, musician, and author, known primarily for his work as a spoken-word performer in the 1970s and 1980s. His collaborative efforts with musician Brian Jackson featured a musical fusion of jazz, blues, and soul, as well as lyrical content concerning social and political issues of the time, delivered in both rapping and melismatic vocal styles by Scott-Heron. (Broken Radio took the liberty to make an edit to suit current times)

Religion – Major League Bullshit

Good Morning Planet

Yesterday night something strange happened, as usual. A friend messaged me posing a question,

“Have you converted to Islam?”

Recently I have been writing about Islam and Prophet (PBUH), a lot. So, I can’t really blame him. People always perceive and believe the easiest possible explanation . What they fail to grasp is, religion, like any other belief is just a web of entangled, confused, misinterpreted, set of words and quotes. It’s just another story and most certainly a captivating one. Now, when it comes to all the floating stories currently on paper and in tube, I like the love story of Khadeeja the Great and Prophet more than any other. It makes a lot of sense. Out of sheer love came a set of belief so powerful that it swept the world. The belief system is extremely strong and only preaches love and love and love and love and love, UNCONDITIONAL LOVE.

But as always it’s misinterpreted, (read “Are You a Chimp!“, to know why), twisted for personal gains and propaganda purposes by organized governments and unorganized pseudo governments.  

femen03
Topless activists of the Ukrainian women movement Femen take part in a protest against the fierce opposition from the Roman Catholic Church to authorise gay marriage on November 18, 2012 in Paris. AFP PHOTO KENZO TRIBOUILLARD FRANCE-FEMEN-HOMOSEXUALITY-DEMO

“George Carlin – When it comes to bullshit, big-time, major league bullshit, you have to stand in awe of the all-time champion of false promises and exaggerated claims, religion. No contest. No contest. Religion. Religion easily has the greatest bullshit story ever told. Think about it. Religion has actually convinced people that there’s an invisible man living in the sky who watches everything you do, every minute of every day. And the invisible man has a special list of ten things he does not want you to do. And if you do any of these ten things, he has a special place, full of fire and smoke and burning and torture and anguish, where he will send you to live and suffer and burn and choke and scream and cry forever and ever ’til the end of time!

But He loves you. He loves you, and He needs money! He always needs money! He’s all-powerful, all-perfect, all-knowing, and all-wise, somehow just can’t handle money! Religion takes in billions of dollars, they pay no taxes, and they always need a little more. Now, you talk about a good bullshit story. Holy Shit”

391289

Bill Maher: The irony of religion is that because of its power to divert man to destructive courses, the world could actually come to an end. The plain fact is, religion must die for mankind to live. The hour is getting very late to be able to indulge in having in key decisions made by religious people. By irrationalists, by those who would steer the ship of state not by a compass, but by the equivalent of reading the entrails of a chicken. George Bush prayed a lot about Iraq, but he didn’t learn a lot about it. Faith means making a virtue out of not thinking. It’s nothing to brag about. And those who preach faith, and enable and elevate it are intellectual slaveholders, keeping mankind in a bondage to fantasy and nonsense that has spawned and justified so much lunacy and destruction. Religion is dangerous because it allows human beings who don’t have all the answers to think that they do. Most people would think it’s wonderful when someone says, “I’m willing, Lord! I’ll do whatever you want me to do!” Except that since there are no gods actually talking to us, that void is filled in by people with their own corruptions and limitations and agendas. And anyone who tells you they know, they just know what happens when you die, I promise you, you don’t. How can I be so sure? Because I don’t know, and you do not possess mental powers that I do not. The only appropriate attitude for man to have about the big questions is not the arrogant certitude that is the hallmark of religion, but doubt. Doubt is humble, and that’s what man needs to be, considering that human history is just a litany of getting shit dead wrong. This is why rational people, anti-religionists, must end their timidity and come out of the closet and assert themselves. And those who consider themselves only moderately religious really need to look in the mirror and realize that the solace and comfort that religion brings you actually comes at a terrible price. If you belonged to a political party or a social club that was tied to as much bigotry, misogyny, homophobia, violence, and sheer ignorance as religion is, you’d resign in protest. To do otherwise is to be an enabler, a mafia wife, for the true devils of extremism that draw their legitimacy from the billions of their fellow travelers. If the world does come to an end here, or wherever, or if it limps into the future, decimated by the effects of religion-inspired nuclear terrorism, let’s remember what the real problem was that we learned how to precipitate mass death before we got past the neurological disorder of wishing for it. That’s it. Grow up or die.”today

To sum it up for you,

“Isha V Singh – Organized Religion is a slow cancer. Keep Praying. God won’t save you.”

Pretty Boy PM Modi : The Smiling Salesman

PM Modi is a remarkable salesman.

He used to sell tea, now he sells Country.

Broken Radio rewards him Sales Man – 2017 – The Smiling Fox

469011-modi-onama-zee1443385611-5779635789678201136878-zuckmodiarticle-2774118-21C8F74D00000578-303_964x847BN-IL018_ichinm_G_20150515011632BN-KO577_modiga_G_20151001052409Modi in BerlinModifriend

Congrats Modi Boy! You Rock!

Why so Serious?

There is not even a single shred of evidence in universe, supporting, Life is Serious.

Isha V. Singh

I step out of my broken abode, I see trembling faces.

I look closer. Fear-struck are they. Fear of being judged, touched, loved, hated, heard, unheard, rejected, cheated, raped. Fear of being happy.

Fear of finding peace and tranquility. Fear of freedom from the chaos.

It’s very troubling to see, poor souls suffer. What can I do?

I can try telling some stories that might help you.

heath_ledger_batman_movies

“I’d consider myself a realist, alright? But in philosophical terms I’m what’s called a pessimist… I think human consciousness is a tragic misstep in evolution. We became too self-aware. Nature created an aspect of nature separate from itself – we are creatures that should not exist by natural law… We are things that labor under the illusion of having a self, that accretion of sensory experience and feelings, programmed with total assurance that we are each somebody, when in fact everybody’s nobody… I think the honorable thing for our species to do is to deny our programming. Stop reproducing, walk hand in hand into extinction – one last midnight, brothers and sisters opting out of a raw deal.

― Rust Cohen

“Today a young man on acid realized that all matter is merely energy condensed to a slow vibration, that we are all one consciousness experiencing itself subjectively, there is no such thing as death, life is only a dream, and we are the imagination of ourselves. Here’s Tom with the Weather.”
Bill Hicks

“The world is like a ride in an amusement park, and when you choose to go on it you think it’s real because that’s how powerful our minds are. The ride goes up and down, around and around, it has thrills and chills, and it’s very brightly colored, and it’s very loud, and it’s fun for a while. Many people have been on the ride a long time, and they begin to wonder, “Hey, is this real, or is this just a ride?” And other people have remembered, and they come back to us and say, “Hey, don’t worry; don’t be afraid, ever, because this is just a ride.” And we … kill those people. “Shut him up! I’ve got a lot invested in this ride, shut him up! Look at my furrows of worry, look at my big bank account, and my family. This has to be real.” It’s just a ride. But we always kill the good guys who try and tell us that, you ever notice that? And let the demons run amok … But it doesn’t matter, because it’s just a ride. And we can change it any time we want. It’s only a choice. No effort, no work, no job, no savings of money. Just a simple choice, right now, between fear and love. The eyes of fear want you to put bigger locks on your doors, buy guns, close yourself off. The eyes of love instead see all of us as one. Here’s what we can do to change the world, right now, to a better ride. Take all that money we spend on weapons and defenses each year and instead spend it feeding and clothing and educating the poor of the world, which it would pay for many times over, not one human being excluded, and we could explore space, together, both inner and outer, forever, in peace.”
Bill HicksQunexc-Don-t-Be-Madness-Joker-Quote-Motivational-Art-Silk-Poster-The-Dark-Knight-Rises-24x36inch.jpg_640x640
My father was a drinker and a fiend and one night he goes off crazier than usual. Mommy gets the kitchen knife to defend herself. He doesn’t like that, not one bit. So, me watching he takes the knife to her, laughing while he does it. He turns to me and he says “WHY SO SERIOUS!?”. He comes at me with the knife “why so serious!?” Sticks the blade in my mouth “lets put a smile on that face!” aaaand….. why sooooo serrrious?
Why are You so Serious?
f6a132547431b0eac72d0498243e1cbe.jpg

Advertising Lullaby – George Carlin

erase

 

Quality, value, style, service, selection, convenience
Economy, savings, performance, experience, hospitality
Low rates, friendly service, name brands, easy terms
Affordable prices, money-back guarantee, free installation.

Free admission, free appraisal, free alterations,
Free delivery, free estimates, free home trial, and free parking.

No cash? No problem! No kidding! No fuss, no muss,
No risk, no obligation, no red tape, no hidden charges,
No down payment, no entry fee, no purchase necessary,
No one will call on you, no payments or interest till December, and no parking.

nuns_she_1_billboard

Limited time only, though, so act now, order today, send no money,
Offer good while supplies last, two to a customer, each item sold separately,
Batteries not included, mileage may vary, all sales are final,
Allow six weeks for delivery, some items not available,
Some assembly required, some restrictions may apply.

Shop by mail, order by phone.
Try it in your home, get one for your car.
All entries become our properties, employees not eligible,
Entry fees not refundable, local restrictions apply,
Voidware prohibited except in Indiana.
lion__large
So come on in for a free demonstration and a free consultation
With our friendly, professional staff. Our courteous and
Knowledgeable sales representatives will help you make a
Selection that’s just right for you and just right for your budget.

And say, don’t forget to pick up your free gift: a classic deluxe
Custom designer luxury prestige high-quality premium select
Gourmet pocket flashlight.

And if you act now, we’ll include an extra added free complimentary
Bonus gift: a classic deluxe custom designer
Luxury prestige high-quality premium select gourmet leather style wallet.
With detachable keychain, and a pencil holder.
It’s our way of saying thank you.

dr-seuss-advertising-art-2

And if you’re not completely satisfied, you pay nothing.
Simply return the unused portion for a full refund, no questions asked.
It’s our way of saying thank you. Keep your free gift.

Actually, it’s our way of saying ‘Bend over just a little farther
And let us stick this big dick into your ass a little bit
Deeper.

AAEAAQAAAAAAAAduAAAAJGMxY2QyMDU1LWQ2Y2EtNDc5Zi1iNTZjLWFjYTIyMTMzN2ZmMA.jpg

ADDICT

Addiction is a condition that results when a person engages in an activity  that can be pleasurable but the continuation of which becomes compulsive and interferes with ordinary responsibilities and concerns, such as work, relationships, or health. People who have developed an addiction may not be aware that their behavior is out of control and causing problems for themselves and others.

I guess..
I’m addicted to the bullshit, the drama, the pain.
Ludicrous on a panaroma, drivin me insane.
Still gives me fuel to my fire,
Fire in my soul, just can’t retire
Glorified then crucified, just Like Jesus Christ
Hell or heaven, still I write…
Do me a favor haters, no more favors tonight!

What u can’t trust, you shouldn’t lust

#RagemanJD

d93e6be76a8b4e003365faeea05b213c

Let’s get High! On lyf 

The Infamous Love Guru – OSHO

Truth is within you, do not search for it elsewhere.

Live wakefully, Die each moment so that you can be new each moment.

Do not search. That which is, is. Stop and see.

Love Guru – OSHO

Shree Rajneesh (born Chandra Mohan Jain, 11 December 1931 – 19 January 1990), also known as Osho, Acharya Rajneesh, or simply Rajneesh, was an Indian Godman and leader of the Rajneesh movement. During his lifetime he was viewed as a controversial mystic, guru, and spiritual teacher. In the 1960s he travelled throughout India as a public speaker and was a vocal critic of socialism, Mahatma Gandhi, and Hindu religious orthodoxy.[6] He advocated a more open attitude towards human sexuality, earning him the sobriquet “sex guru” in the Indian and later international press, although this attitude became more acceptable with time.

“When love expresses through you it first expresses as the body. It becomes sex. If it expresses through the mind, which is higher, deeper, subtler, then it is called love. If it expresses through the spirit, it becomes prayer….”

In 1970 Rajneesh spent time in Mumbai initiating followers known as “neo-sannyasins.” During this period he expanded his spiritual teachings and through his discourses gave an original insight into the writings of religious traditions, mystics, and philosophers from around the world. In 1974 Rajneesh relocated to Pune where a foundation and ashram was established to offer a variety of “transformational tools” for both Indian and international visitors. By the late 1970s, tension between the ruling Janata Party government of Morarji Desai and the movement led to a curbing of the ashram’s development.

aosho4

In 1981 efforts refocused on activities in the United States and Rajneesh relocated to a facility known as Rajneeshpuram in Wasco County, Oregon. Almost immediately the movement ran into conflict with county residents and the State government and a succession of legal battles concerning the ashram’s construction and continued development curtailed its success. In 1985, following the investigation of serious crimes including the 1984 Rajneeshee bioterror attack, and an assassination plot to murder US Attorney Charles H. Turner, Rajneesh alleged that his personal secretary Ma Anand Sheela and her close supportters had been responsible. He was later deported from the United States in accordance with an Alford plea bargain.

68314012.VHfLbKDX.rajneesh103

After his deportation 21 countries denied him entry, and he ultimately returned to India, and a reinvigorated Pune ashram, where he died in 1990. His ashram is today known as the Osho International Meditation Resort.

His syncretic teachings emphasise the importance of meditation, awareness, love, celebration, courage, creativity, and humor—qualities that he viewed as being suppressed by adherence to static belief systems, religious tradition, and socialisation. Rajneesh’s teachings have had a notable impact on Western New Age thought, and their popularity has increased markedly since his death.

“If everything goes well and sex is natural and flowing it is a beautiful experience because you can have a glimpse of the second through it. If sex goes really very deep, so that you forget yourself completely in it, you can even have a glimpse of the third through it. And if sex becomes a total orgasmic experience, there are rare moments when you can even have a glimpse of the fourth, the turiya, the beyond, through it.”
 
But if sex fails, then many perversions happen to the mind. These perversions are expressed in hatred. Hatred is a failure of sex, a failure of love energy. Violence, lust for money, the continuous conflicting attitudes of egos: war, politics – these are all sex perversions.”
a1826cc6fbc5e8c2d93240044dc76dd1.jpg

The Spy who din’t LOVE ME : Putin, Vladimir Putin

Demoralize the enemy from within by surprise, terror, sabotage, assassination. This is the war of the future.

Adolf Hitler

Good Evening Planet, Tonight’s entertainment is the most powerful, enigmatic, billionaire, socialite, also,

President of The cyber states of United Mother Russia

Vladimir Vladimirovich Putin 

(Crowd Cheers, Putin! Putin! Putin!) 

A Spy who didn’t LOVE me

President Putin is a macho, take-charge superhero. He takes shit from nobody and he never forgets. Ask Miss Clinton, she’s still devastated from her loss. Mr Putin and Ms Clinton were lovers once upon a time but she broke his heart. She also bad mouthed him in public like a soulless, crooked, jilted, lover. For her own political gains, she used Lover Putin and then threw him away like lady slippers.

Super-Putin doesn’t like anyone badmouthing him. He gets angry. He’s worse than HULK, when he’s angry. He starts riding dangerous animals to channelize his anger.

Putin loved Hillary more than he loved his KGB job as a Spy. She too fancied him. They spent some great times together. He was a spy who loved her deeply.

But she broke his heart. She rejected him saying,

“You were a KGB agent. By definition you don’t have a soul. You are incapable of loving someone.”

She orchestrated her hate just to win a position in the filthiest place of human history.

A place even painters shy away from. The White House.

Putin is of artistic nature. He loves colors as much as he loves his women. Putin hated Hillary for breaking his heart. He got Insomniac. He lost his appetite. He decided to go again into the jungle, to channelize his aggression, by taming wild animals. But this time he met someone. Someone completely lunatic. Someone who not only helped him channelize his energy in a healthy manner and helped him get revenge over Hillary. But also made him :

President of The cyber states of United Mother Russia

1putinforpresidentCOL.jpg

That remarkable person whom Putin met would be referred by historians in future as:

Bottom-Bitch Trump 

Here’s what Bottom-Bitch Trump says about Lover Putin:

“I would be willing to bet I would have great relationship with Putin. It’s all about love.”

 

Issue-9_Art_Humor_Putin-and-Trump-Christine-Jegarltrumputin26e-1-web

We would return soon after a short commercial break. Don’t go anywhere. Stay tuned in and subscribe to our blog, so that you do not miss such epic love stories.

Here’s what’s coming after break :

putin-trump-bitch

Mysticism : Deciphering Sant Kabir

 

“Listen, my friend. He who loves understands.”

Before we begin talking about one of the original mystics, Kabir, let’s understand Mysticism.

Mysticism is popularly known as becoming one with God or the Absolute, but may refer to any kind of ecstasy or altered state of consciousness which is given a religious or spiritual meaning. It may also refer to the attainment of insight in ultimate or hidden truths, and to human transformation supported by various practices and experiences.

Derived from the Greek word μυω, meaning “to conceal”, mysticism referred to the biblical liturgical, spiritual, and contemplative dimensions of early and medieval Christianity. During the early modern period, the definition of mysticism grew to include a broad range of beliefs and ideologies related to “extraordinary experiences and states of mind”.

In modern times, “mysticism” has acquired a limited definition, with broad applications, as meaning the aim at the “union with the Absolute, the Infinite, or God”. This limited definition has been applied to a wide range of religious traditions and practices, valuing “mystical experience” as a key element of mysticism.

“The Lord is in me, the Lord is in you, as life is in every seed, put false pride away and seek the Lord within..”
― Kabir

Kabir was a 15th-century Indian mystic poet and saint, whose writings influenced Hinduism’s Bhakti movement and his verses are found in Sikhism’s scripture Adi Granth. His early life was in a Muslim family, but he was strongly influenced by his teacher, the Hindu bhakti leader Ramananda.

Kabir is known for being critical of both Hinduism and Islam, stating that the former was misguided by the Vedas and the latter by the Quran, and questioning their meaningless rites of initiation such as the sacred thread and circumcision respectively. During his lifetime, he was threatened by both Hindus and Muslims for his views. When he died, both Hindus and Muslims he had inspired claimed him as theirs.

“Listen to the secret sound, the real sound, which is inside you. The one no one talks of speaks the secret sound to himself, and he is the one who has made it all.”

Kabir suggested that True God is with the person who is on the path of righteousness, considered all creatures on earth as his own self, and who is passively detached from the affairs of the world. To know God, suggested Kabir, meditate with the mantra Rāma, Rāma.

Kabir’s legacy survives and continues through the Kabir panth (“Path of Kabir”), a religious community that recognizes him as its founder and is one of the Sant Mat sects. Its members are known as Kabir panthis.

Some scholars state that Kabir’s parents may have been recent converts to Islam, they and Kabir were likely unaware of Islamic orthodox tradition, and are likely to have been following the Nath (Shaiva Yogi) school of Hinduism. This view, while contested by other scholars, has been summarized by Charlotte Vaudeville as follows:

Circumcised or not, Kabir was officially a musalman, though it appears likely that some form of Nathism was his ancestral tradition. This alone would explain his relative ignorance of Islamic tenets, his remarkable acquaintance with Tantric-yoga practices and his lavish use of its esoteric jargon [in his poems]. He appears far more conversant with Nath-panthi basic attitudes and philosophy than with the Islamic orthodox tradition.

— Charlotte Vaudeville on Kabir (1974), 

Some commentators suggest Kabir’s philosophy to be a syncretic synthesis of Hinduism and Islam, but scholars widely state that this is false and a misunderstanding of Kabir. He adopted their terminology and concepts, but vigorously criticized them both. He questioned the need for any holy book, as stated in Kabir Granthavali as follows:

Reading book after book the whole world died,
and none ever became learned!

— Kabir Granthavali, XXXIII.3, Translated by Charlotte Vaudeville

Many scholars interpret Kabir’s philosophy to be questioning the need for religion, rather than attempting to propose either Hindu-Muslim unity or an independent synthesis of a new religious tradition. Kabir rejected the hypocrisy and misguided rituals evident in various religious practices of his day, including those in Islam and Hinduism.

Saints I’ve seen both ways.
Hindus and Muslims don’t want discipline, they want tasty food.
The Hindu keeps the eleventh-day fast, eating chestnuts and milk.
He curbs his grain but not his brain, and breaks his fast with meat.
The Turk [Muslim] prays daily, fasts once a year, and crows “God!, God!” like a cock.
What heaven is reserved for people who kill chickens in the dark?
Instead of kindness and compassion, they’ve cast out all desire.
One kills with a chop, one lets the blood drop, in both houses burns the same fire.
Turks and Hindus have one way, the guru’s made it clear.
Don’t say Ram, don’t say Khuda [Allah], so says Kabir.

— Kabir, Śabda 10, Translated by Linda Hess and Shukdeo Singh

In Bijak, Kabir mocks the practice of praying to avatars such as Buddha of Buddhism, by asserting “don’t call the master Buddha, he didn’t put down devils”. Kabir urged people to look within and consider all human beings as manifestation of God’s living forms:

If God be within the mosque, then to whom does this world belong?
If Ram be within the image which you find upon your pilgrimage,
then who is there to know what happens without?
Hari is in the East, Allah is in the West.
Look within your heart, for there you will find both Karim and Ram;
All the men and women of the world are His living forms.
Kabir is the child of Allah and of Ram: He is my Guru, He is my Pir.

— Kabir, III.2, Translated by Rabindranath Tagore

Charlotte Vaudeville states that the philosophy of Kabir and other sants of the Bhakti movement is the seeking of the Absolute. The notion of this Absolute is nirguna which, writes Vaudeville, is same as “the Upanishadic concept of the Brahman-Atman and the monistic Advaita interpretation of the Vedantic tradition, which denies any distinction between the soul [within a human being] and God, and urges man to recognize within himself his true divine nature”. Vaudeville notes that this philosophy of Kabir and other Bhakti sants is self-contradictory, because if God is within, then that would be a call to abolish all external bhakti. This inconsistency in Kabir’s teaching may have been differentiating “union with God” from the concept of “merging into God, or Oneness in all beings”. Alternatively, states Vaudeville, the saguna prema-bhakti (tender devotion) may have been prepositioned as the journey towards self-realization of the nirguna Brahman, a universality beyond monotheism.

Kabir has been criticised for his depiction of women. Nikky-Guninder Kaur Singh states, “Kabir’s opinion of women is contemptuous and derogatory”. Wendy Doniger concludes Kabir had a misogynist bias. For Kabir, states Schomer, woman is “Kali nagini (a black cobra), kunda naraka ka (the pit of hell), juthani jagata ki (the refuse of the world)”. According to Kabir, a woman prevents man’s spiritual progress.

Woman ruins everything when she comes near man;
Devotion, liberation, and divine knowledge no longer enter his soul.

— Kabir, Translated by Nikky-Guninder Kaur Singh

Singh states that this outlook of Kabir about women and their role in human quest for spirituality was not shared with Nanak who founded Sikhism. Surjit Singh Gandhi also agrees with this.

In contrast to Singh’s interpretation of Kabir’s gender views, Dass interprets Rag Asa section of Adi Granth as Kabir asking a young married woman to stop veiling her face, and not to adopt such social habits. Dass adds that Kabir’s poetry can be interpreted in two ways, one literally where the woman refers to human female, another allegorically where woman is symbolism for his own soul and Rama is the Lord-husband.

 

I guess the above stated material serves the need of hate propaganda for all the religions. So that’s why, Let’s go to Riot. Let’s take out axes and pitchforks and kill each other in the name of religion. I hope God would save you. You are essential. This entire planet thrives because of you and your closest advisor called GREED. Or let’s understand this quote and pray to the ALMIGHTY.

“बुरा जो देखण मैं चला, बुरा ना मिलया कोए
जो मन खोजा अपना, तो मुझसे बुरा ना कोए”

When I went looking for evil, I found it lurking inside, In my soul!

Translated by Nishant

Khadija the Great

“God Almighty never granted me anyone better in this life than her. She accepted me when people rejected me; she believed in me when people doubted me; she shared her wealth with me when people deprived me; and Allah granted me children only through her.”

Welcome back readers. Ramadan Kareem!

Today’s Iftar entertainment is the least talked about, yet the greatest of all times, Love story. It’s about a not so simple girl Khadījah al-Kubra who later on became the “Mother of the Believers” (Khadijah the Great) and attained the status of the most important female figures in Islam.

 Khadija was a daughter of a merchant. She was scholarly and inquisitive. Khadija married three times and had children from all her marriages. Her husbands met accidental demise. And Khadija was all by herself in a big, ugly, misogynist society. Khadija has also been referred in many texts as the “Wise One“. She was a highly driven and intelligent person, like our today’s corporate women.

Due to her eloquent personality and great business skills, Khadija became a very successful caravan merchant in no time.  It is said that when the Quraysh’s trade caravans gathered to embark upon their summer journey to Syria or winter journey to Yemen, Khadija’s caravan equalled the caravans of all other traders of the Quraysh put together. She was known by the by-names Ameerat-Quraysh (“Princess of Quraysh”), al-Tahira (“The Pure One”) and Khadija Al-Kubra (Khadija “the Great”). It is said that she fed and clothed the poor, assisted her relatives financially and provided marriage portions for poor relations. Khadija was said to have neither believed in nor worshipped idols.

Khadija did not travel with her trade caravans; she employed others to trade on her behalf for a commission. One day, Khadija needed an agent for a transaction in Syria. Khadija needed someone who could be trusted.

Muhammad who was 25 years old, due to his helping attitude was addressed as Al-Sadiq (“the Truthful”) and Al-Amin (“the Trustworthy” or “Honest”). Khadija hired Muhammad, offering to pay double her usual commission. 

She sent one of her servants, Maysarah, to assist him. Upon returning, Maysarah gave accounts of the honorable way that Muhammad had conducted his business, with the result that he brought back twice as much profit as Khadija had expected. Maysarah also relayed that on the return journey, Muhammad had stopped to rest under a tree. A passing monk, informed Maysarah that, “None but a prophet ever sat beneath this tree.”

Khadija became joyful because the same morning, she had a dream in which the sun descended from the sky into her courtyard, fully illuminating her home. She knew what her heart wanted now. Because of her social status many wealthy Quraysh men had already asked for her hand in marriage, but she had refused all of them. She had waited long for her knight in shining armor, and finally the wait was over.

But Khadija din’t know how to express her love. She used to engage in long conversations with Muhammad, on false pretext of work, hoping someday she would have the courage to say her feeling. But she never could. Somehow when Muhammad looked at her, time used to freeze. There are many texts which indicate that one day, Muhammad came to Khadija and looked into her eyes and they both stood silently, staring at each other blankly, till the nightfall. This captivating event was interrupted by, Khadija ‘s entrusted friend named Nafisa.

Nafisa was aware of Khadija’s feeling towards Muhammad. Nafisa suggested Muhammad to consider marrying. Muhammad was hesitant because he had no money to support a wife.

 But as they say,

“It might take a year. It might take a day. But, what’s meant to be will always find a way.”

Weeks later, love struck, Muhammad and Khadija consulted their respective uncles. The uncles agreed to the marriage, and Muhammad’s uncles accompanied him to make a formal proposal to Khadija. Khadija’s uncle accepted the proposal, and the marriage took place.

Muhammad and Khadija were married monogamously for twenty-five years. When Muhammad reported his first revelation from the Angel Gabriel, Khadija was the first person to convert to Islam.

After his experience in the cave of Hira, Muhammad returned home to Khadija in a state of terror, pleading for her to cover him with a blanket. After calming down, he described the encounter to Khadija, who comforted him with the words:

“Allah would surely protect him from any danger, and would never allow anyone to revile him as he was a man of peace and reconciliation and always extended the hand of friendship to all.”

According to some sources, it was Khadija’s cousin, Waraka ibn Nawfal, who confirmed Muhammad’s prophethood soon afterwards.

Muhammad and Khadija had six children. Khadija died in “Ramadan” of the year 10 after the Prophethood”, Muhammad later called this tenth year “the Year of Sorrow

So this was the greatest love story of all times – Khadija n Muhammad.

Love is not about how many days, months or years you’ve been together. Love is about how much you love each other everyday.

‘A’ishah, whom Muhammed married later, narrated of Muhammed and Khadijah in Sahih Bukhari:

“I did not feel jealous of any of the wives of the Prophet as much as I did of Khadijah though I did not see her, but the Prophet used to mention her very often, and when ever he slaughtered a sheep, he would cut its parts and send them to the women friends of Khadijah. When I sometimes said to him, “(You treat Khadijah in such a way) as if there is no woman on Earth except Khadijah,” he would say, “Khadijah was such-and-such, and from her I had children.”

 It is also narrated: The Messenger of Allah said: “The best of its women is Khadijah bint Khuwailid”

muslim_couple_by_rokaaazz-d4dpcar.jpg
Disclaimer : The image above represents a couple in love. It is not a sketch of Prophet and his wife. 

 

 

Caliphate ISIL : An absurd comedy of Errors – II

ISIL has as much to do with Islam as the Ku Klux Klan has to do with Christianity.

“Muslims are the primary victims of ISIL. Muslims are the ones who want to do the most to defeat this ideology. It’s important that we don’t do their propaganda for them, by giving them the legitimacy that they crave.”

Dalia Mogahed
American-Egyptian researcher

Broken Radio welcomes you all, to Episode 2 of your favorite TV Show

Caliphate ISIL : An absurd comedy of Errors.

Here’s Recap for you :

Prophet Muhammad is viewed as the final prophet of God in primary branches of Islam. The first caliphate, the Rashidun Caliphate, was established immediately after Muhammad’s death in 632, often referred by the term Dil Dil Caliphate. Islamic State of Iraq and the Levant declared itself a caliphate under Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi on 29 June 2014 and renamed itself as the “Islamic State“, always referred as The Evil Death Cult. Something must have gone terribly wrong in the world between the first and the last Caliphate. Lets find out.

ISIL has achieved a status which Bin Laden did not even dream of. Unlike Al Qaeda, which has generally been methodical about organizing and controlling its terror cells, the more opportunistic Islamic State is content to crowd-source its social media activity—and its violence—out to individuals with whom it has no concrete ties. And the organization does not make this happen in the shadows; it does so openly in the West’s most beloved precincts of the Internet, co-opting the digital services that have become woven into our daily lives. As a result, the Islamic State’s brand has permeated our cultural atmosphere to an outsize degree.

Laden was an old, runaway, who hid in caves and was hunted down by U.S Seals in our friendly neighbor Pakistan’s house. Laden used to take 7 months in order to finalize a video script. Laden had absolutely no online presence. Laden didn’t even have a credible FB Page. Isis on the other hand  is as much a media conglomerate as a fighting force.

ISIL originated as Jama’at al-Tawhid wal-Jihad in 1999, which pledged allegiance to Al-Qaeda and participated in the Iraqi insurgency following the 2003 invasion of Iraq by Western forces. The group proclaimed itself a worldwide caliphate and began referring to itself as Islamic State (الدولة الإسلامية ad-Dawlah al-Islāmiyah) or IS in June 2014. As a caliphate, it claims religious, political, and military authority over all Muslims worldwide. Its adoption of the name Islamic State and its idea of a caliphate have been widely criticised, with the United Nations, various governments, and mainstream Muslim groups rejecting its statehood.

In the year 2003, this happened in Iraq :

An invasion began on 20 March 2003, with the U.S., joined by the United Kingdom and several coalition allies, launching a “shock and awe” bombing campaign. Iraqi forces were quickly overwhelmed as U.S. forces swept through the country. The invasion led to the collapse of the Ba’athist government; President Hussein was captured during Operation Red Dawn in December of that same year and executed by a military court three years later. However, the power vacuum following Saddam’s demise and the mismanagement of the occupation led to widespread sectarian violence between Shias and Sunnis, as well as a lengthy insurgency against U.S. and coalition forces.

The Bush administration based its rationale for the war principally on the assertion that Iraq possessed weapons of mass destruction (WMDs) and that the Iraqi government posed an immediate threat to the United States and its coalition allies. Select U.S. officials accused Saddam of harboring and supporting Al-Qaeda, while others cited the desire to end a repressive dictatorship and bring democracy to the people of Iraq. After the invasion, no substantial evidence was found to verify the initial claims about WMDs. The rationale and misrepresentation of pre-war intelligence faced heavy criticism within the U.S. and internationally.

Here is what really happened. The international community, especially the U.S., always viewed Saddam as a bellicose tyrant who was a threat to the stability of the region. After the September 11 attacks, Vladimir Putin began to tell the United States that Iraq was preparing terrorist attacks against the United States.

President George W. Bush spoke of an “axis of evil” consisting of Iran, North Korea, and Iraq. Moreover, Bush announced that he would possibly take action to topple the Iraqi government, because of the threat of its weapons of mass destruction. Bush stated that

“The Iraqi regime has plotted to develop anthrax, and nerve gas, and nuclear weapons for over a decade … Iraq continues to flaunt its hostility toward America and to support terror.”

Clearly terror was the only talking point in this conversation.

Terror has a good market. Terror sells.

quote-terrorism-is-the-best-political-weapon-for-nothing-drives-people-harder-than-a-fear-adolf-hitler-59-65-98Hitler-12

After the said war was over, President Bush gave a Mission Accomplished Speech.

Bush’s speech noted:

We have difficult work to do in Iraq. We are bringing order to parts of that country that remain dangerous.

Our mission continues…The War on Terror continues, yet it is not endless. We do not know the day of final victory, but we have seen the turning of the tide.

The speech also said that:

Major combat operations in Iraq have ended. In the battle of Iraq, the United States and our allies have prevailed.quote-the-reason-we-start-a-war-is-to-fight-a-war-win-a-war-thereby-causing-no-more-war-george-w-bush-64-63-101-vEyDX9zQR46_zGZUqvKgTQ

This was the end of the so called WAR Against Terror.

Let’s catch up again tomorrow. Same time. And subscribe to the blog, leave comments too. Here’s a food for thought for you!

art-on-terror

@brokenradiocreatives @ishasingh10

Hijab – A Veil worn by Muslim Women

Hijab – A Veil worn by Muslim Women

I am extremely agitated by the fact that I am investing my time addressing an issue about a piece of cloth worn by women. I was under the impression that feminists were taking care of it. But I was wrong. I guess I need to be more in tune with popular media.

Today morning I saw a video as per YouTube’s recommendation. It was a talk show. A friend of mine was in it. Hanna Yusuf. She is a freelance writer with an interest in feminism, interfaith matters, and the European-Muslim identity. She tweets at @HannaAYusuf.

She was addressing a recent EU court ruling.

‘Employers are entitled to ban workers from wearing headscarves.’

Let’s act as human beings for a second. Hijab as per the popular culture belief is a veil traditionally worn by Muslim women in the presence of adult males outside of their immediate family, which usually covers the head and chest.

But that is not entirely true. Let’s replace the term Hijab with Veil. Veiling did not originate with the advent of Islam. Statuettes depicting veiled priestesses precede all major Abrahamic religions (Christianity, Judaism, and Islam), dating back as far as 2500 BCE.

 Elite women in ancient Mesopotamia and in the Byzantine, Greek, and Persian empires wore the veil as a sign of respectability and high status. 

Prophet Mohammed was a renowned scholar. People swarmed to meet him from all across the globe.

He says in Sura 33:53

“And when you ask [his wives] for something, ask them from behind a partition. That is purer for your hearts and their hearts”.

Even you won’t like, your wife, talking to total strangers. This verse, however, was not addressed to women in general, but exclusively to Muhammad’s wives. As Muhammad’s influence increased, he entertained more and more visitors in the mosque, which was then his home. Often, these visitors stayed the night only feet away from his wives’ apartments. It is commonly understood that this verse was intended to protect his wives from these strangers.

There you go. It’s not a Muslim thing. Popular culture, please correct yourself.

I fancy Rockstars. I have a Black T-shirt. I used to wear it on Fridays at work. (Once upon a time, I was a corporate slave too) It used to say Peace Love Rock n Roll. I happily wore it to work. Nobody questioned me. I did not offend anyone.

As per the EU court ruling, any worker wearing headscarves at work can be banned. But the detailed synopsis suggests it only applies to Muslim Women. If a White American Women decides to wear a headscarf because she finds the look to be cool or she too thinks, hair are private, and doesn’t wish to display in public, it’s acceptable.  Further analysis suggests that the ruling has been taken keeping in mind that Hijab is offensive to people and preaches religion.

I am a man. Women wear barely impact my life in any manner. But I was wondering, what if tomorrow EU decides that my black T-shirt is spreading the religion Rock and my tee is offensive. I would be outraged. I act stupid when I am outraged. I burn things.

Anyways I am no expert in women wear, so I leave it on you. Below are two pics. One is of Hanna and other one is of Queen Rania of Jordan. None of them offend me. But as per EU, Hanna should and Queen Rania shouldn’t. Do leave comments on the blog if you find Hanna’s headscarf offensive. Comment is free. And subscribe to my blog if you liked the article. Happy Ramadan!

maxresdefaultbg12

Why I’m In Love With ‘Baahubali’

Yes. I’m in love with ‘Baahubali’. Both the movie & the character.

In fact all the characters in the movie. And I’m not the only heart the ‘Baahubali’ franchise has won. The world seems to have been swept away in this wave of free flowing love for the movie. To say that it’s a blockbuster is an understatement. Never in the history of our nation has a movie rocked the box office & wrecked it this BAD.

More than a 1000 crores and counting BAD.

 

But what’s the reason behind this phenomenal success saga? Is it the strong, well sketched characters? Is it the special effects? The fact that the actors have , perhaps, given the best performances of their lives so far or maybe that they ever will? Is it the beautiful, powerful soundtrack that compliments the essence of the film? Or is it all of the above? It’s all this and more. The movie does haverepeat value’ something that old movies had and cinema, today, lacks.

The problem with movies today is that they are closer to life

rather than larger than life.

Cinema worked the way it did and gained popularity because it was larger than life.

The grandeur, the deep characters, the morality, the good overcomes evil narrative, the loaded dialogues and the beautiful, meaningful melodies attracted people to the movie halls. Things were portrayed artistically, tastefully and differently, from real life.

Who wants to spend approximately Rs 1500 (the approximate cost of taking a family of four to the movies sans the expenses of purchasing eatables in the multiplex) for something mundane, very life like, routine? Who wants to hear a character similar to the college student next door, swearing away to glory, that too at a price!

It was called the ‘Silver Screen’ for a reason!

Film makers have forgotten the art of story telling. In fact, most movies they churn out lack stories and a powerful plot. This is exactly why movie makers must resort to heavy publicity, woo a more global audience, sell movie rights and keep a frantic check on music downloads to recover the cost of the budget itself.

This is not to say that the occasional movie doesn’t do well. But most of them are average performers and a large number are flops. And that’s because deep down, we look for idols in our favorite movie stars. We want to see them live the life of our fatntasies on screen. When ‘Devsena’ picks up her sword and cuts the finger off a molester, I feel empowered. All I get to do in real life is maybe slap my molester, how awesome is it that she gets to maim him!

 

I will never fight a battle against evil, how gratifying is it, to watch ‘Baahubali’ do just that and with such power and authority, not to mention skill!

‘Baahubali’ stands for all that we miss in our cinema and what we aspire to be deep within. Strong portrayal of characters, memorable, striking dialogues, stellar performances, breathtaking cinematography, beautiful music, costumes, grand sets, etc. A visual delight and a message that tells you if you’re good, you shall succeed in the end. It appeals to the inner moral compass each of us posses.

 

Let’s hope movie makers realize from the success of this epic saga, that titillation is a tactic that will not work for long. What will woo the audience is a little respect for their sensibilities , better stories and memorable, moral characters that are extraordinary.

 

Let’s Call this Love!

I know. I sure do know. You guys are gonna start screaming that why am I talking about Love. I am well aware some of you have left your lovers because you believed in my saying that love is an illusion. I still stand by that statement.

But I too deserve to act stupid at times. We all get to have a little fun. Yes, In a longer run mostly everything turns to shit. And so does Love. Something which initially starts as a tiny funny feeling in your lower abdomen metamorphoses into a pain inducing tumor in your head towards the end days and then becomes cancerous and kills you. Then you slowly and gradually pick the broken pieces and then start looking for someone else to make you feel whole, for a little while, again. This basically sums up everyone’s love lives.

But let’s focus on the first few days. To clearly explain why love is so addictive, I am going to present to you my LSD trip notes. Love is as addictive as any other drug and has exactly the same effects. Here is love explained for all of you.

You start seeing colors. Your lover takes over your consciousness and you feel aware after a very long time. You no longer feel the need of being lonely. You start believing – Experiences are more enjoyable when shared! You experience a surreal time shift. It feels your world is slipping beneath your feet and is being replaced by a bright yellow light. The light of freedom, with a shade of captivity . You make paintings which capture how you feel because no amount of words can explain this divine phenomenon. And no fucking blog can tell you what it feels, when you on LOVE. Remember ‘ON LOVE’ not ‘IN’. It’s a fucking drug.  The colors dance and they talk too. 

That’s how the initial days feel like. And then –

‘DEATH – That’s what happens to every FUCKING BEAUTIFUL THING. IT FUCKING DIES. WE KILL IT’.

Didn’t the Ancient Mariner kill the poor naked Albatross?

Anyways, I am in the initial days so let me have fun. Atleast till EID! And guys a fact which you might not know cause you do not use all your senses, all the time – Women’s Vagina and a freshly made Painting smell alike. That’s it for this afternoon.

Delhi – The Rape Capital

It’s 07:45 am. It’s a beautiful Sunday morning in the capital town of India, New Delhi. New Delhi is the capital of India. India is a great country. Though it is a ‘bit’ overpopulated, where ‘bit’ is being used as an understatement inducing agent.  India is also a very just nation.

Because Delhi is world’s worst places and natives of this place are really evil, Indians decided not to outcast Delhi but reward it with the title – Capital. Being a capital city is a great responsibility. You need to make sure you are overpopulated and scarce of resources. This in turn would hike prices and people would work hard and earn less. The city would get costly and to an outsider would glitter ‘RICH’.

A Rich place is a good place. Lights should always stay on. You should never sleep. Delhi never sleeps. It works 24/7. In between naps it robs, kills, scams, whores and rapes too. Delhi likes raping. India enjoys rape. India makes rape a frequent activity. Indians believe every women has a secret desire to get raped. The world also shares a similar belief.

India rapes in Delhi, Noida, Gurgaon, Surat, U.P and before you tell me to stop stating that you know this and you choose to ignore because things like these are depressing. I would like to state the real fact. Yes every women has a desire to get raped. And that is not at all a secret. And as shocking as it would hit you, every man also has a desire to get raped. The entire human consciousness has a desire to get raped, wherein rape stands for losing control over self and let the universe run it’s own course. Rape means not to try and control anything because it’s a futile attempt. Rape doesn’t always mean a sexual crime, you depraved society! That would be it for today. Have a nice day.

My Friends In School

 

Everyone has bitter – sweet memories of school. As a child, I’d been to a number of schools but the one I found most interesting was the one I spent the most time in. And the reason I find it interesting now is because of the fact that we read & learnt in an environment where we sort of co-existed with different kinds of animals. And when I say coexisted, I MEAN coexisted. You see, we had a pair of pugs, called Barnie & Bernie, a rooster whose name I don’t remember, A Great Dane called ‘Sultan’, a bunch of swans, a few ducks, a parrot called ‘Mithu’ & a few other varieties of birds! That’s not all, all except the Great Dane, were allowed to roam around freely within school premises which meant an occasional visit from a few of them in the classrooms! The most frequent visitors were the pugs & the most notorious too because more often than not, their visit was accompanied by an embarrassing visual of the two of them humping, or trying to at least! Embarrassing for the humanity in question because frankly, Bernie & Barnie gave not a single damn to whoever was watching!

The rooster managed to single handedly bring down the level of excitement caused by pugs by his inactivity. All I ever recall ‘him’doing is standing in front of the full length mirror positioned outside of one of our classrooms, in the corridor, & just staring at his handsome self. I was first introduced to the concept of narcissism by that rooster. He didn’t mind sharing the mirror because he wouldn’t even glance at you if you stood & observed your own reflection in that same mirror. You can now begin to understand where I come from in life, I’ve spent most of my childhood sharing a mirror with a rooster, after all!

The ducks & swans usually kept to themselves. We had to invade their space each day for the morning assembly but they gladly shared the lawn area of the school with us. At times one of them would come crashing toward the assembled children, but would usually just bump into the school administrator, Mr Paul, & head back to his waiting friends. The animals remained normal around most of us, caused no trouble & shared space quite happily, but they had a thing for Mr Paul. The pugs being the assholes they were, would almost always come & pee on his foot, and his alone, each time he tried to speak in the morning assembly! Both of them. So much so that this had become a ritual we had all begun to accept, more so because if you laughed, Mr Paul would make it a point to single the laughing child out of the gathering of students to try & break his or her spirit. But of course, the opposite effect was achieved and what ensued was a fit of laughter among every teacher & student present within the premise, during that time. But Mr Paul never got it. He always felt we were laughing at the student he held captive. That was not the case of course.

‘Sultan’was held away from us because he was deemed ‘dangerous’ because of his size by some of the parents, which was a shame because those of us who did visit him sometimes, knew that he was very gentle around us. Maybe it was Mr Paul’s safety they really feared for. I don’t know.

This was my life, during my adolescent years, surrounded by animals, learning an important lesson about co-existence and all because the owner of our school was an animal lover. In fact, she still is involved in several animal welfare schemes and rescue operations. If she would have had her way, we would have had a donkey among us too! But that never happened because he was too injured for a full recovery.

I wonder what that would have been like though. I really do.

Baked To Perfection!

Do you like cakes? I love them!

Do you like perfection? I appreciate it!

I also love gazing at ornamental cakes, almost as much as eating them!

So I was just going through images of cakes online, for some reason, was sitting & naming them & I thought why not share them with other cake enthusiasts! (Please don’t judge me, you can’t be meaningful all the time!)

So here are a few Cakes I found online that, in my opinion, have been BAKED TO PERFECTION!

cake
The Porcelain Donut
cake11
Chocolate Wood
cake12
Tasty Tiara
cake2
Double Trouble
cake3
Fantastic Four
cake4
Hansel & Gretel
cake5
Santa’s Gift
cake6
Floral Delight
cake7
Mauve Tower
cake8
Zebra Crossing
cake9
Blooming Dale
cake10
Crystal Boon
cake104
Black Beauty

It’s A Long Way To The Top If You Wanna’ Rock & Roll!

 

It’s a long way to the top if you wanna Rock&Roll!

 

What the fuck is wrong with you people? I am asking this assuming, some of you might know.

Don’t you have something better to do?

 

How about television? Common, don’t be shy. It is your favorite pastime.

Not today.

Did no one make plans with you? Go to some movie or a little shopping, a little clubbing maybe. No?

That bad. Hmmm.

You can play some games, they are pretty involving. You can listen to those stupid tracks saved in your phone, you call it music. Check your FB, maybe post a selfie on INSTA. These things matter.

Isn’t that right?

You can always color your hair. Try that new shampoo you bought after seeing that commercial. Groom yourself a little. Get those yellow stained teeth cleaned. You not going to look any younger or any better. But try.

You can always sleep. I am an insomniac since the age of 14: The day I first saw a pair of titties. A 40-year-old milf neighbor showed me the doors to heaven. You call it child sex abuse. At my time, it was called fun.  Haven’t had any sleep since that day. But you love sleeping. Don’t you?

If you are hell bent on reading this, I must warn you. Nothing would change. You would read this, appreciate, get enlightened. And then the very next evening, you would go and buy something more entertaining. Who reads books? You do not get laid by reading books. Be honest.

They call me Goat-boy. I am a musician. No, no!

They call me Goat-boy. I am an artist. Oh, shit, no!

My name is Goat-boy. I am a recovering sex addict. Fuck this shit!

Okay, so my name is Goat-boy. I am diagnosed with chronic Insomnia. I am also a recovering sex addict. I play guitar. Shit man!

My name is Jack. I am an artist. Maybe. Maybe not.

But I like calling myself one. I create music, at least try to. I am not too good at what I do but seeing the current logistics, who is? Is Trump a good president?

You only need to be good to do great things: To make money, mediocrity does the trick. Look at you, you make money and good is a very distant expression for you. You are shitty and clumsy but still, you make good money. Don’t you?

I never wanted to be a musician but an interesting mix of life events landed me the trade.

 I won’t admit that it was easy but yes it wasn’t so tough either. My doctor asked me to channelize my sexual energy into something more meaningful than watching porn and wanking. He suggested me to try writing, painting, dancing… I thought a lot. None of these people get laid, a lot.

Writers, they are fucking sex starved delusional.

Painters, they are fucking sex starved crazies.

Dancers, they got no energy left to fuck.

Rock stars, You know the glamour. You would get laid, why won’t you? You are a Rock- star!

So I thought to try my hands on creating some original rock music. Apart from playing music, I also enjoy burning shit.

“Burn It To The Ground”

I was listening to the Radio. Nickelback was playing. Music always pleases me. It makes the voices in my head go away. You should also listen to music. But just wanted to advise you that, “Char bottle Vodka, Kaam uska roz ka” (Four bottles of Rum, Bitch drinks every day…. Please show me how she pukes and shits d pain away.) is not music. These lyrics are not thoughtful. If you listen to this kind of music, I am sure your God would save you. The same God whose idols you purchase for $50 at your nearest place of religious communion – A shopping mall!

I focused on the lyrics.

Well it’s midnight, damn right, we’re wound up too tight
I’ve got a fist full of whiskey, the bottle just bit me
Oh
That shit makes me bat shit crazy
We’ve got no fear, no doubt, all in balls out

We’re going off tonight
To kick out every light
Take anything we want
Drink everything in sight
We’re going till the world stops turning
While we burn it to the ground tonight

Suddenly doctor “UD” came. So, our doctor, an unattractive male in his 40’s, never got married. He got laid the first time when he was 28 years old and got his first job. That too because the nurse had a bad breakup and wanted a rebound. A decent doctor worked for her.

Now, he always had an issue with nervous ticks.

For the STUPID: Nervous ticks, are involuntary muscle movements caused by stress and anxiety.

Doc: Goat-boy, You know why you here?

Me: Yes sir.

Doc: Then you also know that if you do not stop lighting fire to financial institutions, they would send you to a prison. They are only acting patient with you because of your fan following.

Me: No problem. I would light the prison on fire. Lighting fire is my passion. I like it.

Doc: No. It’s a medical condition. You are a delusional and an Arsonist. You need medical attention.

Me: Okay Sir. As you say. But did you ever think why I only burn Financial institutions?

UD: Tell me!

Me: Financial institutions make money. Money is historically an emergent market phenomenon establishing a commodity money, but nearly all contemporary money systems are based on fiat money.[4] Fiat money, like any check or note of debt, is without use value as a physical commodity. It derives its value by being declared by a government to be legal tender; that is, it must be accepted as a form of payment within the boundaries of the country, for “all debts, public and private”. (For the stupid – Money is just a piece of paper and it has no value because it has no great saying or quote written over it. It’s abso-fuckin-lutely of no value.)

UD: Got it. Now make sure you buy your prescription from the shop outside. And also book the next week’s visit by paying $250 advance. Get well soon, Goatboy. We love you! 😊

Let’s get naked and run through the Jungle!

Let’s get naked and run through the Jungle!

 

A thought just came to my mind. A minute ago. Let’s get naked and run through the Jungle. I know what you are thinking, “Aa gaya pagla phir se.” (Here comes the crazy again.) But then in my defense, I have all the facts with me. Please hear me out for two minutes. I won’t rob you off your wealth. Corporations and religions are for that purpose. I just need two minutes, please. And also, “Insanity is just a state of mind like sanity. Who knows who’s what? I certainly don’t (#mostdef)”

My question to you is, “Why not?” We are clothed and civilized because we are supposedly social beings. But are we? I don’t see many social things being done around. I just see few people making money and others buying the goods made and sold by them. Then I also see Television, (fuck Television – the kind you watch. I watch RT.com), which has a propaganda content airing 24/7*365. Everywhere they teach you how to buy things and how to make money to buy em. No one teaches you to achieve freedom and not to willingly submit to slavery. A wise man said –

Don’t let the ones that want to steal your dreams 
They’ll steal your dreams away 
Just laugh and let it go 

So you’ve tried to pass along your doubt 
Oh you need somebody’s ears to hear you shout 
All your wasted and days and twisted ways are up 
So now it’s time to see the cards you dealt 

Don’t let the ones that want to steal your dreams 
They’ll steal your dreams away 
Just laugh and let it go 

A wise one said. Not me. I am the crazy one. So, the point being made is, “What’s the point of a consumerist society?” Why fight for it’s thriving? Let it perish and rot away in oblivion. Let’s just orchestrate a Phoenix event. (In the historical record, the Phoenix could symbolize renewal in general as well as the sun, time, the Empiremetempsychosisconsecrationresurrection, life in the heavenly ParadiseChristMaryvirginity, the exceptional man, and certain aspects of Christian life”.[3]). We no longer need to buy things. All of us who want things to change and pave way for a better tomorrow, Let’s just sell our possessions. Buy a ton of books. Buy a backpack. Burn our identifications. Become no one. Because “It’s only after we’ve lost everything that we’re free to do anything.”

“Let’s be a part of the great Rainbow Family. Let’s get naked and run through the Jungle!”

Follow me at – https://www.facebook.com/nishantnishit

Subscribe to my blog for propaganda content towards a movement against consumerism and PEACE.

Are you a chimp?

Are you a chimp?

 

Darwin told you, a long time ago that you were a chimp! You agreed, Didn’t you? But he made a small error. Yes, I said it. Loud and clear that Darwin made a mistake. Great men make mistakes too. That’s why Rome fell.

Darwin said you were a chimp. No motherfucker! You still are. Yes, you evolved physically but then that’s about it. You did not read books. You thought it’s too much of work. Let’s just look good and dress well, design an economy which resembles musical chair. Someone would always lose. It’s a musical chair. Those are the rules. And then you decided to fuck nature up and you enjoying, having fun. Just like chimps do. Break twigs, shit, puke, fuck, steal, at times hunt too. That’s your whole fucking story.

So, you still are a chimp! You were a chimp and you are a chimp.

I know some of you are laughing right now thinking I am joking but no I am not. I am damn serious. I am as serious as you were when you decided to nuke Hiroshima to make a point. A very small point. That you were a better chimp. Not so long ago you also decided to eliminate a breed of fellow individuals. One of the alpha male of your esteemed chimp community, ‘Sir great chimp – Hitler’, decided to kill Jews. You just stood there in shock and awe and I don’t know what as I wasn’t born then.

In my time another chimp, ‘Sir Donald fucking Trump chimp’ is doing the same. He wishes to kill every Muslim brother. That’s how chimps do it.

Now some of you are thinking what is my propaganda behind writing this. Am I a Muslim? Am I a naturalist? Do I have a PhD? How am I so confidently stating the but obvious truth. Well, for your chimp brain let’s just assume that I am Charlie Marvin, seventh great-grandson of Charles Darwin. And I also talk to the universe, because I am a human being, not a chimp! Unlike you.

So, please pay a very close attention to what I am saying. You are a fucking chimp! Okay! And you accidentally got the gift of language. You are not supposed to know the language. Because you use it to spread hate. You do not use it to spread love or peace. You should only communicate in sign language. Because you are a chimp and chimps are not supposed to talk.

And then came the shittiest moment in human history. You chimps got access to Inter fuck it Net. Holy Fuck! What’s gonna happen now? Every fucking chimp got smart devices. LMAO! LOL! Killing fucking language. (Smiley Emoji).  Because you don’t understand language. You are not supposed to talk.

And all of you who are thinking right now that you are a human being. Well, you are wrong too. You are also a chimp! Because you don’t understand, ‘Where there is will, there is a way’.  You don’t understand,”Honesty is the best policy“. You don’t understand,”Time and tide wait for none“. You don’t understand,”Find something you love and let it kill you”. You don’t understand,”Go all the way or don’t even start”. You don’t understand,”You are a piece of shit”. I don’t know why am I wasting my time talking to you. You won’t understand.”You are a chimp!“.

Please don’t buy a book. Go buy an I-Phone.

Charles Marvin seventh great-grandson of Charles Darwin.

Artist ¦Naturalist

Lover, Leave Me Alone!

Lover, please leave me alone

Lover, please leave me alone

Let me die with my sightless eyes

Let me die with my punctured lungs

Let me die with my crushed hopes, dreams and my broken bones

You don’t wanna nourish me

You just wanna judge

Pretentious, ignorant female

I would never budge

I am, I was, I will be

Cause I am time

I am wealth

I am stars, the sun, the moon…Saturn too

Your thoughts can’t leap

They like Snails

They sweep, all the dirt

all the earth, since birth

You are destined to crawl and die

Everyone gets by, everyone gets by

Lover, please leave me alone

Lover, please leave me alone

Video – The View

It is very unlikely that we, the general population, will ever be able to voyage into outer space & see the wonders of the universe the way future space travelers will.
 For us, the next best experience would be a long night flight. However, from the inside of an aircraft cabin you will not see much & more often than not, most passengers sleep.
 The pilots in the flight deck are lucky as they get to see the night sky like no one else does. If one could create a time lapse video from the cockpit during a long night flight, it would be simply amazing , almost surreal.
 A Boeing 777 pilot did just that! On a flight from Zurich to Sao Paolo in South America, this creative Senior First Officer created an amazing time lapse video as his plane flew over three continents. Keeping him company is the Milky Way, millions of stars & meteors of the Perseid Meteor shower!
During the flight he switches on the landing lights to greet pilots of other flights as they shoot by over head.
The accompanying music is perfect.
The pilot shot the sequences using a Sony A7S camera which has very high ISO ratings. He also used a fast f 1.4 lens.To shoot a time lapse like this from the cockpit of a plane travelling at nearly the speed of sound is simply indescribable.
WATCH & get ready to be mesmerized!

‘Advisors’ – A Pseudo Rap

I hate myself

I always have..I always will

But I hate you more

‘ Cause YOU just wanna’ make me your money churning whore.

 

‘Do this not that, censor your words’ ,  you say

And all I gotta’ say is ‘Nay nay nay’

 

I am a survivor, I won battles

I stood up with broken ribs,

I sew my own stitch

I take what I want… I ain’t the one who calls ‘DIBS’

But to you, that is my ego talking

‘Cause in reality,

I am just a billboard ,walking  & talking

Ain’t that true ?

Ain’t that true ?

I wanna’ get mum

Get me some of Capt. Jack Sparrow’s RUM

I had a compass..I dint need anyone

I was lost but I was not in pieces..

I was one..

Crush me more..Why have pity?

I need it for my art, said he.

How To Find Tarak Mehta Ka Oolta Chashma Funny!

Find fun, when there is none!

Sounds great, doesn’t it? That’s the benefit of optimism! It’s also something I fall back on when I can’t fall asleep & it’s past midnight, my Wi-Fi isn’t working & I must make a choice between loneliness & T.V. So I chose T.V & I’m faced with yet another choice. Television Retail ‘Infomercials’ or some dumb program I wouldn’t admit to watching the next day! So I choose the latter & that’s how I end up in the company of the loud characters of ‘Tarak Mehta Ka Oolta Chashma’!

For starters, I begin with the exercise of translating the title into other languages I know.

‘Tarak Mehta’s upside down Spectacles!’ 

‘Tarak Mehta’s Lunettes à l’envers’

‘Tarak Mehta’s Occhiali da testa’

‘Tarak Mehta’s ਉਲਟਿਆ ਐਨਕਾਂ’

‘Tarak Mehta’s 颠倒的眼镜’

Exotic! And funny because I am so disinterested in the show, that I’d rather make a translation game out of it’s title than watch it! But I’m set to give it a try so…

Mission Impossible begins. The comic cues a.k.a loud sounds of laughing audiences in the  ‘sitcom’ help me identify the laughter joints where I am supposed to crack up. It’s all similar to the 5 am laughter club with their’ infectious laughter I get to hear in the park behind my apartment. But at the comic junctions of my television it’s seamless and involves less effort than those oldies in the park, I can vouch for that. You just need to practice once or twice and, believe me, it just flows…But you need to be consistent in watching…medicines also cure when taken regularly, remember the golden rule?

Have you ever been able to notice how loud the costumes , gestures and expressions are? Unbelievable! With their kind of get up, do they even need to act loud? Naah! They sometimes do try though!

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

 

I am also always bowled over by the unique dialogues they deliver…mind blowing! I usually go “Never heard of that before” every 5 seconds of that show! That’s funny in itself. Makes you laugh. If not, try damn you! That’s what such dialogues are crafted for, we ought to respect that at the very least!

www.hdfinewallpapers.com

By now, Daya Bhabhi has probably retained that wide mouthed, stretched out, ogle eye expression for life! For this alone she deserves a salute.

If nothing else, just the sheer lameness of it all ought to make you laugh! I mean look at them! It’s so bad that it’s good! Get it?

You don’t? Oh! you’re just, just, heartless that’s all! Huh!

Religious Memes

Memes are a recent internet fad that make their way into any situation in life. In fact, a day on the internet cannot go by without a few thousand memes floating around, going about their business. Everyone likes memes, c’mmoooonnnnnn times infinity if you don’t! But like everything else in this world, memes are corruptible too. And what better way to corrupt something nice & dandy than bring religion into the picture? Huh? Huh?

I am not talking about the ones that ridicule religion in itself. I am referring to the phenomenon of ‘RELIGIOUS MEMES’! Yikes!

So without playing any more games, here’s proof of the matter. I present to you, the lamest Religious Memes on the internet that will blow you’re mind more than anything else you see today. And not in a good way.

 

  1. meme2
    I know dude! Painful AF!
    meme10
    Actually you’re right! It’s hot & that scarf has no business over my head. Thanks for pointing that out!
    meme11
    She’s as badass as her daddy allows her to be!
    meme12
    But what if that’s the only time I read it huh?
    meme12
    So! Copying & pasting Hadith not such a bad idea after all eh?
    meme13
    What the fuck am I supposed to make of that?
    meme14
    Oh grow a nut! Or is that haram too?
    meme15
    Too many pins near the head could result in brain damage! And you’re living proof!
    meme16
    Okay! This one’s not lame LMAO!
    meme4
    Yeah! You better check with feminists first, Jesus! ‘Cause anybody else defining consent will get them pissed off as hell!
    meme5
    And bust your brains open!
    meme6
    Too bad!
    meme7
    Yeah! And a cat has 9 lives too!
    meme8
    So, basically, you can’t pray for SOMETHING…unless you pray for EVERYTHING! I get that, totally!

    meme9
    Makes ‘Shiva is cool stoner’ meme on the internet…writes ‘Teetotaler, proudly in matrimonial column!

Facebook : What Could Go Wrong?

I am not a conspiracy theory nut job. But I feel like pretending to be one right now. So be cool & play along will you? Let’s relax, take a deep breath & imagine everything that could possibly go wrong in your life because of different Facebook functions. Just for fun!

Profile Picture/Cover Picture –

While most pictures are set to a private setting in most FB accounts, it’s highly likely that your profile or cover picture is still public. Which means anybody can download it or save it & morph it to feature you on one of those porn websites you secretly visit! Even if your pictures are private, including your profile picture, what’s to stop hackers from getting into your account anyway? I mean, it could happen right? I know FB will tell you it can’t. But even a 0.1% chance is still a chance of something happening.Think about it.

Check In –

You’re basically letting the world know each tiny detail about your whereabouts. The exact location & exact time of your destination. Under what other circumstances, than the carefully engineered ones created by Facebook, would you do that? Even if sending a message to 500 people was made as easy as posting a check in on Facebook, would you do it? This is especially risky if you’re a regular visitor to the place. A jilted lover would know your travel times & patterns. It could put your children under risk for abduction, especially if you check in to their school, play pens, extra classes like gym, dance etc a lot.

Tagging –

You do realize that tagging is actually face recognition? You don’t? Think you have control over it & by simply removing tags you can fool Facebook? Try this. Tag one of your friends in a picture & then try tagging them incorrectly after 10 months. Or a year. Or two years. Facebook will tell you that’s not Mary but Jane, each time. Creepy huh.

Customized News Feed –

The customization isn’t just limited to your friends’ posts or pages you like. That would be appropriate. It goes on to decide what you want to view, based on what you search for on google, what you viewed on ANY website that has the Facebook share icon on it, what you viewed on an e-commerce website or what you recently bought. It’s like someone is watching every move you make. You shall never starve for attention again!

The ‘Heritage’ poster –

That’s right. We will follow you not only to your grave but beyond. While you are alive & well, Facebook allows you to share every little detail about your life for all to see. But what’s amazing is, even after you die, your FB account must go on, so you can add a heritage buddy who can make posts on your behalf once you die. Rumor has it that they will be launching an application called ‘Ouija’ through which your heritage buddy can contact your soul to know EXACTLY where you checked in after death. After all, the world must know that you’re ‘Feeling sad’ once you’ve checked into Hell!

So that’s the top 5 super creepy Facebook functions I could think of. I’m sure if I think hard enough I will be able to add more to it’s creepy quotient. However, I think I have indulged in more scaremongering than my soul can allow for a day. Besides, a little birdie told me that Facebook can read your thoughts while you’re looking at the home page. It just asks you to ‘What’s on your mind’ because it wants to validate whether you’re telling it the truth! Dare not be dishonest with Facebook! Or God knows where you will be ‘checking in’ next!

Indian Daily Soaps : Then & Now

It is a painful subject. But what needs to be addressed, needs to be addressed. This is the more awkward version of the dreaded ‘birds & bees’ talk that parents, up until a generation ago, had to have with their off spring. I mean, what can be more embarrassing than having to sit down with your 10 yr old & try & explain to him or her where babies come from. Right? Um, wrong. I would have ‘the talk’ with my child any day than having to explain to him what the hell is happening in the serial his family watches.

But there was a time when Indian television was far more evolved & the industry did churn out some of the most thought – provoking, sensitive & even controversial serials of the time. So, without further ado, allow me to share a list I prepared of some of the most popular television shows, then & now and what they represent.

  1. Shanti (1994)

shanti_052411091426

India’a first ever daily soap, with Mandira Bedi playing the lead, Shanti was the story of a young, confident, bold journalist who aspires to unravel the truth behind the friendship and enmity between two strong male characters in the serial & the challenges she faces in the process. Now compare that with…

Sasural Simar Ka – (2011 & Running)

477894-sasural-simar-ka

This is the story of a young girl who starts out as the ‘bahu’ (daughter in law) of a family her father chooses for her to marry into that switches from one bizarre twist to another in a matter of seconds. One episode, she’s a regular ‘bahu’ doing the dishes & minding everyone else’s business, the next, she is a fly on the wall! Some days the family dwelling is full of irate women talking to themselves planning to murder people, the next day it’s literally a house of horrors! Subtle…

2. Rajni – 1985

hqdefault

This was the story of a middle class , married woman who was aware & very ahead of her times. She was fearless , strong & stood up against injustice when she saw it. The serial addressed many social issues like theft, child abuse, work place harassment etc with sensitivity & gave an important social message in each episode.

Sath Nibhana Sathiya –  2010 & Running

maxresdefault

This is the story of two cousins who get married into a joint family. The orphaned cousin is meek, seldom speaks & is always self-sacrificing while the other is manipulative bitch. The mothers in law, are two in number & play good cop bad cop. Then, the manipulative cousin dies & another one fills her shoes as the ‘badi bahu’ of the ‘khandaan’ . Meanwhile the husband loves the meek wife some days & shuns her on others. In one such mood swing he marries another woman, who is very ‘modern’ & then there’s a time leap. During this period the issues the collective household tackles are grave, such as a rat in the house, a laptop that’s been washed accidentally & a few murders. That’s about it.

3. Hum Log – 1984

_27cbc9ce-b55f-11e5-9ceb-2d30c6caf0ea

The first ever soap opera to be aired in the Indian sub-continent, Hum Log was the saga of  an Indian middle-class family and their daily struggles and aspirations. It was created on the lines of a Mexican television series, Ven Conmigo (1975), using the education-entertainment methodology.

Yeh Rishta Kya Kehlata Hai – 2009 & Running

cnSuS Yeh-Rishta-Kya-Kehlata-Hai

The ongoing story of a girl who becomes a ‘bahu’ then faces some challenges adjusting in the new joint family. A few stern looks here, a few subtle hints there & the episode is generally wound up except for a few  accidents & financial losses. That, & the main leads die. And there’s a time leap. And there’s a daughter. And she’s getting married. And there are stern looks here, subtle hints there. And she misses her mommy who she feels could have helped her cope with the stern looks & the subtle hints. Sob. Sob.

4. Buniyad – 1986

bun

This iconic television series was based on the story of a patriot & freedom fighter, Haveli Ram, & his family and their ordeal during the partition of India & Pakistan in 1947.

PCTV-81-hd

Diya Aur Bati Hum – 2011 & Running

Again, the story of a young ‘bahu’ in a joint family with a stern mother in law & a loving husband. The daughter in law is faced with the choice of having a baby because the MIL wants it or become a policewoman because she wants it. Of course she ends up doing both & tackling terrorists with a nuclear bomb who threaten to diffuse it in the presence of her MIL, who she saves , who then starts to love her & realize the importance of police service all at the same time. While all this is happening, the children are ready to be married & somehow the policewoman bahu mistakes a city in Pakistan to be a city in India & ends up selecting a ‘bahu’ for her son from the ‘enemy’ country! Oops! & Gasp! What follows is MS Power point effects of orgasmic proportions. And then they die. And there’s a time leap.

5. Surabhi – 1993

surabhi

‘Surabhi’ was a popular Indian cultural show that showcased the activities and life of women and families in an enterprising society. It dealt with their success and achievements.

Splitsvilla – 2008 & Running

0976e836ccc34c8082457dd6110c4616_1280X7200312d12ef09f49ae4af5894cde44e9e852d2_1280X720

A popular ‘reality’ show, where you see men & women competing to retain fellow contestants as ‘dates’ & use profanity, manipulation & overt sexuality to do so. The show usually starts with an ‘audition’ round where contestants appear to make statements like ” I want to become something”, or ” I want to prove my critics wrong” & then end up proving quite the opposite. Especially disappointing are the women, who make claims like “I was abused & all my life I have wanted to teach my abuser to respect girls & I want to show him women are not just sexual objects” & then go on to objectify themselves.

The thing is, I can go on & on, but I think I have made my point. But I can’t rest my case till I make everyone realize that this garbage being fed to our families each day exists only because we let it.

There’s no supply without a demand for something. Cut the demand. Stop watching this nonsense. Low television rating points make production houses nervous. They would have to start respecting audiences & come up with better content only if we start respecting ourselves first.

‘Fuck Television. At least the kind you watch’

%d bloggers like this: